A Black President Before a Black 'Bachelor'?

A Black President Before a Black ‘Bachelor’?


ABC's matchmaking show features all-white contenders. Why that won't change for a while.

By Joshua Alston | Newsweek
Feb 5, 2010


As potential trophy husbands go, Jake Pavelka is mighty shiny. A charming pilot with flawless teeth and a chivalrous demeanor, the only thing missing in his life is the right woman to enjoy the bounty of his pectorals. He's the leading man in this season of The Bachelor, a show I'm watching for the first time and am absorbed in. But as I watch the remaining women vie for Jake's hand in marriage, I can't help but think: Why are all of these people white? In fact, in the 14-season history of the show, all of the bachelors have been white, along with a staggering majority of the women available to him.


My first inclination was to call the show's executive producer and ask. But then I thought better of it. Why waste time with a crafted, politically correct explanation when I already know the answer? People still overwhelmingly date and marry within their own race. White people are the majority in this country and, therefore, the best audience to target from a ratings standpoint, and there's risk in alienating viewers who may have less enlightened views on interracial couples. Could they cast a black man? Sure. Would it be smart to? Probably not.

The Bachelor is one of many pop-culture artifacts that highlight the uncomfortable gap between the way we'd like to think of racial integration and the way it actually is. Just as people of different races don't often date each other or worship together, we also don't read many of the same books, or like many of the same movies, or adore many of the same celebrities. Certainly not as much as we'd like to believe.


Periodically, controversies arise when people are forced to confront this dissonance. Vanity Fair just released its Hollywood issue, and gracing its cover are nine rising starlets, all of them wispy, white women. The blogosphere erupted: why no women of color? Two possible explanations: One is that, according to Quantcast, 85 percent of Vanity Fair's online readership is white. The other reason is that the actress most often floated as a potential addition to the cover is Gabourey Sidibe of Precious.

What's been so refreshing about Sidibe's reaction to her newfound fame is that she seems totally aware that, as a big black woman, her breakthrough role isn't going to lead to her being cast opposite Ryan Reynolds in a romantic comedy. In Hollywood, to be overweight and black is to be a character actor, probably doomed to a résumé full of credits like "DMV Worker" and "Concerned Passenger." Is this fair? Certainly not. But what's the value in attacking a symptom? Vanity Fair, like The Bachelor, didn't create the disparity, they just committed it to film. That's not to say we shouldn't strive for progress whenever possible. J. J. Abrams, to his credit, cast Boris Kodjoe and Gugu Mbatha-Raw as the male and female leads for his new NBC thriller Undercovers, a bold choice considering both are black, neither are household names, and the characters (married spies) don't necessarily call for black actors. But it's an experiment to say the least.


People of different races talk over each other's heads all the time: Monty Python and Tyler Perry, Erykah Badu and Diana Krall, John Updike and Zora Neale Hurston. Sometimes our pop-culture universes overlap; other times we're just nodding and smiling politely. The ever-brave 30 Rock made a gag about it, when Liz Lemon (Tina Fey) responded to a friend accusing her of stereotyping: "You know me, I never make assumptions about race. Remember I asked that black guy if he had seen Sideways?"


The truth is, it's disturbing how divided we still are in some respects, so we convince ourselves these divisions don't exist, then bristle when we're reminded otherwise. It's a goal for America to reach a point at which people of different races are integrated in every facet of life; we'll date each other, worship together, and judge movies based not on the color of their characters' skin but on the content of their characters' characters. In the meantime, we'll just have to grin and bear it when reminded that we're not quite there yet. Is it ridiculous that there's a black president before a black Bachelor? Sure, but I wanted the former a lot more anyway.

Interview with former Bachelorette contestant

This interview was posted on FORT after a rather extensive and very insightful conversation about storyboarding. This show is all rather fake, friends.

http://www.freedrive.com/file/700512,bachelorbrad.mp3

My mind has been blown.

P.S. Off for a date with my niece. I'll get back to you later tonight :)

We'll always have Paris: Pain, loss, remorse make it romantic at the movies

We'll always have Paris: Pain, loss, remorse make it romantic at the movies


By Jay Stone, Vancouver Sun, February 9 2010


Romance, n.: an exaggeration, a picturesque falsehood. (Concise Oxford Dictionary)

Okay, it's meaning No. 5, but the one you're probably thinking of — "a love story" — is only No. 4. Romance is a staple at the movies, right up there with picturesque falsehood, but at its best it's not all skipping through the roses to a medley of 1960s hits. Indeed, its essence is something author Anita Brookner called "sadness and impossibility."

Brookner is a fine one to cite, I know: she's the author of drawing room dramas whose heroines are often abandoned to pathetic loneliness. But she has a point about romance. In the best love stories, sadness and impossibility are at centre stage.

You see only hints of that in romantic comedy. In romantic comedy, the two people who are made for each other meet, do wonderful being-in-love things (shopping, running hand-in-hand through the park, making gauzy love while fireworks explode in the sky or trains run erotically into tunnels), have an argument, typically over something inconsequential, realize their error, and drive quickly to an airport to reunite. In the better rom-coms, they don't have to drive all the way there: in Breakfast at Tiffany's, for instance, Audrey Hepburn and George Peppard are going to the airport together in a cab (she's bound for a flight to South America) when they stop, get out, and kiss in the rain. I almost forgot kissing in the rain. That usually happens just after skipping through the park.

This pattern has become so embedded that romantic comedy has strained at the edges trying to find barriers for its heroes to overcome: people started travelling through time or being fictional. Even in movies that were pure love stories, rather than rom-coms, the barrier problem persisted as inconsequential arguments gave way to things like actual death (Truly Madly Deeply, say, or Ghost), although even that couldn't stand in the way of picturesque falsehood. But oh, what a lovely lie.

The key is that it's picturesque. F. Scott Fitzgerald — admittedly another imperfect source when it comes to love stories — differentiated between a sentimental person, who thinks things will last, and a romantic, who hopes against hope that they won't. That definition evokes the bittersweet feeling of Casablanca, perhaps the most romantic of all movies: they're in love, but he gives her up for the noble cause of something greater (in this case, the Second World War.) Rick, the character played by Humphrey Bogart, is occasionally accused of being a sentimentalist, and indeed, under his cynical exterior we see a man who has been broken — broken by love, it turns out — and who needs only a call to arms to reignite his greater passion. He's a romantic, a man waiting for salvation.

Casablanca has a happy-sad ending that has never really been equalled in movies, although they have tried: the great love story is differentiated from the romantic comedy mostly by the conclusion. If the couple gets together, it was a comedy. If they don't, it was romance.

This was something Fitzgerald knew, even though he was a mostly failed screenwriter. He went to Hollywood several times, but nothing much happened until 1937, when he returned for a couple of years and worked on several movies that didn't amount to much (A Yank At Oxford, Madame Curie). He met gossip columnist Sheilah Graham, and she lived with him for the rest of his sad and picturesque life. If you're interested in the romanticized version, watch the film Beloved Infidel with Gregory Peck as Fitzgerald and Deborah Kerr as Graham.

The real Fitzgerald finished one screenplay. It was for a movie called Three Comrades, a sad romance about three soldiers in love with a woman dying of tuberculosis. Dying of tuberculosis is one of the most romantic things that can happen (Camille, et al), because it puts deathless love into sharper relief.

Around the same time, Fitzgerald wrote a letter to his daughter saying, "What I am doing here is the last tired effort of a man who once did something finer and better." The aching feeling of doom in that self-evaluation is as sad as anything faced by Jay Gatsby. It’s the cry of the romantic hoping it doesn’t last.

Here are five movies that express the bittersweet allure of romance:

Casablanca: The ideal love story: Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman had an affair and they're still in love, but they have to give it up for a greater cause. The tone is wartime cynicism and tired nobility, the dialogue is timeless, and there's Dooley Wilson singing As Time Goes By. Play it, Sam. Again.

Moonstruck: The most operatic of romantic comedies is the story of a woman (Cher) who gives up a reasonable man when she falls in love with an unreasonable one (Nicolas Cage). The moon hangs low over everyone's passions ("Cosmo's moon," they call it) and while boy finally gets girl, they're all aware that love is the worst thing that can happen to anyone. The worst and the best.

Titanic: Big story, big problems: the poor boy falls in love with the rich girl on the RMC Hubris, the ship that wouldn't sink. We know the voyage is doomed, but we're hooked on the romance: Will Leonardo DiCaprio win the heart of Kate Winslet? Will they survive the sinking? Better still, will only their memories make it? This is a big-budget paean to the sweet brevity of true love.

The English Patient: More tragedy, this time told in flashback, as a dying Ralph Fiennes remembers his affair with Kristin Scott Thomas, the married woman whom had to leave behind, injured, in a desert cave, as he went for help. There are several other love stories and tragedies to negotiate, and some viewers were impatient with the film's twists, but its lushness and its grand passions are intoxicating.

Romeo and Juliet: Even more romantic than Titanic, to which it bears a passing resemblance, the 1968 Franco Zeffirelli version of Shakespeare's play — the one with Olivia Hussey and Leonard Whiting — is the quintessential star-crossed tragedy. Even without moving the action to the streets (as in West Side Story), Zeffirelli turns teenage longing into an aching tale of ill-fated passion.

Happy Valentine's Day -- Everyday

Three Essentials of Couple Etiquette

Yet, even in loving relationships, problems occur when we let it all hang out: We leave the gas tank empty, hog the hot water or break wind in bed. When analysing the responses from a 600-couple survey the Emily Post Institute conducted in 2004, researchers found the key to resolving all that. Couples "who communicated well ... had it made," says Post of the results. "You have to think 'what will be good for us, not just for me.' "

Where Do You Start?

Actions: They do speak louder than words, especially if they come across as inconsiderate. "Ripping through TV channels so fast no one can see them or not cleaning up after yourself in the kitchen are things we could do differently if we stopped to think how they affect others," Post says.

But consideration goes both ways, he adds. A reader once asked if it's rude of her husband to come home and watch TV for an hour before talking to her. "It is, but you also need to give him space to switch gears," he told her. "Instead of being angry, communicate what you want after he relaxes."

Words: Please, thank you and excuse me. "It's so simple, but the kind of words you use could really ease problems, or make things worse," says Post.

Appearance: "How you look is not just about you," says Post, "it reflects on your partner and how you feel about them."

The Top 10 Laws of Couple Etiquette

1. No Smack Talk

"Demeaning attitudes are the biggest problem in relationship etiquette by far," says Post. "You could call it rudeness, but it's being treated like you're not the most important person they're with. People will forgive not holding open the door or not eating with the right fork. But put yourself on a pedestal and treat your partner like their opinion doesn't count? It's the kind of thing they remember for a long time. But most of all, don't be a nag. One thing that any couple needs to do is look at each others' foibles and not expect to change that person 180 degrees. Not everything is a deal breaker."

2. Learn to Compromise

"Compromise is not always a 50-50 thing. Each time an issue comes up, take it individually. Typically, successful couples resolve this type of issue by deferring to the partner to whom the issue matters more."

3. Avoid Blame Game

"Don't hold your choices over someone else's head, if it doesn't work out," says Post. "Don't start pointing fingers, because it's not worth it. Instead, if a glitch arises, solve the problem and move on."

4. Make a Date Night

"I cringe when I hear couples say they don't have time for each other," Post says in his book. "Children should never be used as an excuse for not dealing with each other. A successful couple works just as hard on their own relationship as they do in raising their children."

5. Deal with In-Laws

"You must get along with your in-laws, so make an effort, converse with them and recognize that you have to find something in them that's good and worthwhile," says Post, who recommends negotiating in-law visits beforehand and banning open-ended stays.

6. Talk About It

"Don't let work become something mysterious that you do away from home. Talk to your partner about the good and the bad, your hopes and disappointments, so they have a sense of what's going on in your life outside of the house."

7. Have Fun Holidays

"Take time to slow down and focus on each other. Seize this opportunity to reconnect with the person you want to be with for the rest of your life."

8. Don't Flirt

"Understand what your limits are and never say anything that you'd be embarrassed to have your Significant Other hear," advises Post.

9. It's the Little Things

"Be aware of the value of little gestures," he says.

"Make them a coffee in the morning, write a love note and put it in their briefcase, keep their favourite toothpaste on hand ... it's amazing how this will impact on people."

10. Appreciate Their Efforts

"Instead of thinking about all the things that you do around the house, take a moment to think of what your Significant Other does."

Tessa and Andy's season

Hey, pals,

I came upon this page that hosts all the clips of Tessa and Andy during Andy's Bachelor 10 season. Tessa was his F1, and there were great hopes for another Trista and Ryan. Since the romance is kinda non-existent this season, here's a season, other than Jill and Reid clips, to help bide the time.

An interesting side note: The editor of the current season is different than Andy's season. From my standpoint, this show was much better back when it seemed more real.

Enjoy:

http://www.veoh.com/collection/tessahorst/watch/v632806z6QpjtZY#watch%3Dv619187E3F6dsJ7

Bright Star

Joining the rank of BBC’s Pride and Prejudice, Jane Campion’s Bright Star shines boldly among period pieces. Like the period from whence it came, a time when days were spent languishing in novels and letter writing and sewing, this film creates a generous space in which to dream of love’s tenderness as experienced through John Keats and Fanny Brawne’s love. Not only do the actors’ performances (Abbie Cornish, Ben Whishaw, and Paul Schneider are excellent) impress, but the cinematography and directing is just as heart stopping as Fanny’s loss of John (Keats dies young of tuberculosis.) Caught in a field of purple heather or hanging onto the elegance of Keats' poetry inspired by Fanny, the viewer falls in love right along with the couple. It’s impossible not to be taken by such beauty and art. Finally, the movie’s romance—those stolen kisses and burning glances, his head on her bosom, them face to face on a small bed—carry more heart than anything Mike Fleiss could conjure. It reminds us of a time when love, even at its most unlikely, most damned, most impossible, was still so simple and genuine. They both long for each other and we hear it in their most intimate letters and verse. We see it when they align perfectly, head to head, hand to hand, against the wall that separates their bedrooms. It’s quite possibly the most romantic film I’ve seen this year.

We need some of that.

Here’s a preview:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y7IwhVQa8Uk&NR=1&feature=fvwp

Here’s the score which is just so lovely:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QVTW8-dceOY&feature=related