Men prefer fit and curvy women
By Jari Love, Calgary
I have been in the fitness industry for over 30 years and I have always been intrigued by the link between sex and fitness.
However, it wasn't until recently that I really started thinking about the desires of men and women.
What mainly got me thinking about this was that I started to meet so many women smart, beautiful and successful women who were all single! I couldn't wrap my brain around it.
How could it be that these women, who seemingly have everything going for them can't find a partner?
And maybe it was because I started thinking so much about this, but then I started to notice single men everywhere.
Why weren't these people finding each other? What exactly are men and women looking for?
That's when I created the Jari Love Sex and Fitness survey that asked these questions.
We got over 600 responses from married and single men and women.
I know we don't like to admit it, but let's be honest ladies, how many of us kill ourselves at the gym and constantly watch what we eat in the hopes of turning the heads of a man or two, or just to appease the man we married in hopes that he still thinks we are hot?
And how many of us beat ourselves up both internally and physically, feeling our thighs and tummy after indulging in our favourite chocolate dessert because of what it will do to our figure?
I know many of us do, and -- with the media bombarding us with images of ultra slim models and celebrities with super toned muscles telling us if they can do it, so should we! -- is it surprising we feel the pressure?
But, are these images what men want? Are men most attracted to these body types?
Surprisingly what my survey revealed was an overwhelming no! Seventy four per cent of men said that their ideal body type was not "slender" or "athletic and toned" but "fit and curvy".
In fact the majority selected Beyonce over either a Paris Hilton or Madonna type.
They may be slim and willowy, but that is not what turns most men on.
While fitness is important, men do prefer women with a softness around the middle.
But, this left me confused. If men aren't interested in super defined muscles or super slender waistlines, who exactly are we women trying to please with all the hours spent in the gym and dieting?
Thinking back--wasn't Marilyn Monroe considered to be the greatest sex symbol of all time? Guess what? Her average size was 14 to 16!
When I train women of all shapes and sizes, one of their top requests is to get that sixpack ab look. To achieve that six-pack look your body fat would have to be under 12 per cent, and this is considered unhealthy and dangerous!
Hold onto that thought because NOT one man listed abs as a preferred body part--you heard me right ladies, not one!
In fact, based on the survey, which body type do you think was the favourite among men -- was it the chest, legs, arms, abs or butt -- can you guess? Almost 50% of all men chose the 'bootie' as the favourite body part among the women with legs and chest following behind.
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As the lone male here, I will attempt to represent the male viewpoint. I've had this discussion often enough with Nadya and many other women. They assume reasonably enough that men are somehow behind the obsession with female thinness. But I've never known a man whose favorite female figure is skinny and boyish. Men really do like curves and more specifically hourglass figures.
ReplyDeleteIf women can't hope to meet this unhealthy weight target and men don't even like it, where on earth did it come from? I'm convinced that the ideal is primarily an economic one. The only women who can hope to be this thin are well off enough to work out several hours a day. I see it as being the same kind of twisted cultural obsession as that of binding feet. And the effects are much the same. I don't imagine that men in old China preferred that their wives couldn't walk.
I should write a book about this.
Jim
As an addendum, the lyrics I posted under the last Mad Men post apply quite well. I'm not sure if anyone saw those.
ReplyDeleteSigh.
ReplyDeleteI'd like to hope that women are exercising and eating healthfully more for their own well being than to remain svelte so some guy notices her. Studies also indicate that fitness and a healthy lifestyle enhance self-confidence which we also know to rank pretty high on attractive qualities.
I'm so glad I'm over that time in my life where I cared to impress a guy. Now, if he doesn't like me for me, inside and out, then he's not who I want to spend my life with. We'd obviously butt heads over values.
Hooray for the fit and curvy!
ReplyDeleteJim!
ReplyDeleteI had, in fact, missed those lyrics you posted under the latest Mad Men article. I've read them now. LOVE THEM! Thanks for posting them.
Can we clone you??
M.
Remmi, darling,
ReplyDeleteI second your hooray!
M.
Loved this article! I for one exercise to keep my diabetes in control, to be able to climb a set of stairs and not be out of breath, and to just plain feel GOOD! I enjoy it probably 95% of the time. To be honest, my motivation however, is so that I can drink a few beers Friday night and have a few hershey kisses after dinner and not have to feel like I am affecting my blood sugar or health. Like Leen I am so happy I don't fall into the trap that I am working out to get a man.
ReplyDeleteKoala Heidi! Where've ya been? Miss hearing from you. Do drop in a little more often, okay?
ReplyDeleteI have always been curvy, not skinny, but since the age of 18, I have been active and athletic. Then, a year or so ago, I trashed my knee and discovered that I also had severe osteo-arthritis in it. Consequently, since then, I have not been able to do what I used to. It was only then that I realized how good regular, strenuous exercise made me feel. I miss it so much. Unless I get a total knee replacement, I don't know if I'll ever get my knee function back enough to work out again.
My exercise was all about feeling good in my skin. I never lost any weight exercising but my body proportions and shape changed, I gained tons of muscle and I was stronger and fitter.
When I first had to stop exercising, I actually lost a little weight (that didn't last long). I realized later that I had been losing muscle.
I always enjoyed my daily workouts at the gym but I met there many women who, although obsessed with body image and excessive exercise, didn't enjoy a moment of their time working out. Exercise was something they hated but did anyway, to look good to men.