I found this hilarious, even though I have only read the book and have yet to see the movie.
Bleat, flay, loathe ... one man's search for God on a Cineplex screen
By Pete McMartin, Vancouver Sun August 24, 2010
The other night, I was weeping on the marble-tiled floor of my bathroom in my 4,000-square-foot suburban home with oak floors and granite kitchen countertops and four-car garage and in-ground swimming pool, praying to God. I was praying to God because my life was in ruins, and by that I mean my spiritual life was in ruins, not my material life, because I had sold short when the market went belly-up and made a killing. Still, what's money? Can money buy you happiness and enlightenment? No, unless you have really, really a lot of money.
Because I thought God would appreciate some humour before I got to the dramatic part, I told Him I was a big fan of His work, which I thought was a good line and would look good in print if, say, one day I happened to get a book deal about my search for spiritual enlightenment. But I'm funny like that. Funny, in that sort of way that makes people want to slap me hard on the side of my head. It's one of my best qualities, of which I have many.
Anyway, weeping. There I was on the floor blubbering away and I cried out to God, "God, what am I doing here?" Why was I trapped in this life with a lovely wife and three beautiful children and a six-figure income? Why was I being punished so?
And God, I swear, spoke to me. Or possibly it was the Xanax talking, I'm not sure. But the voice, which sounded like Morgan Freeman's, said, "Pete, get up and go to bed. Then have a couple of drinks. Then maybe take a hot shower because, frankly, you could use one. Then go to your local Cineplex and see Eat Pray Love, starring the luminous Julia Roberts. It will show you the way to spiritual enlightenment. And go to a Tuesday matinee, it's half price."
I did as God said. I went and saw Eat Pray Love. In the theatre were fellow spiritual enlightenment seekers, who, as it turned out, were mostly pairs of women of a certain age, and by a certain age I mean the post-hottie one. Still, I felt a kinship with them. We were all seeking spiritual enlightenment and balance in our lives, though maybe in the interest of more balance they could have started by not getting extra butter on their popcorn. But I quibble.
The movie started with aerial shots of southeast Asian rice paddies, with Julia, in voice-over, talking about female Cambodian and Vietnamese refugees who, chances are, had seen their families and children murdered and who had been raped or wounded, but who, when they went for counselling, Julia said, all they could talk about were boys and romance. "This is how we are," Julia said of all women, and I thought: How true. How true.
Then Julia appeared onscreen, visiting an old wise man in just the cutest little Balinese village. The wise man was named Ketut, and he had, like, three teeth. He looked like an Asian Mickey Rooney. Toothless Asian wise men living in cute villages, of course, know so much more about life than pale materialistic Westerners, though you have to wonder why so many Asian villagers continue to try to sneak into North America by boat. Don't they realize what they have?
Ketut reads her palm and predicts a whole lot of stuff will happen to Julia, who all the while has this look of concern on her face, despite being married to Billy Crudup and living in a restored Westchester mansion and having a successful writing career and having a black girlfriend, which is totally cool and shows that Julia can be comfortable with people of all hues and not just little Asian ones. When she gets back to North America, her husband cruelly suggests they go on vacation to Aruba, and Julia, rightfully enraged at this, says, "I don't want to go to Aruba. I don't want to be married."
And that's that. And then she meets James Franco, who has been miscast in the film as an actor, and she moves in with him, only to grow tired of him after they fold too many clothes together in a laundromat. She ends up one night on the floor beside his bed and she's crying and she says, "I don't know how to be here." Why she is lying on the floor instead of in bed is never explained, but usually with me it's because I've had too much to drink.
Then she travels to countries that all start with "I" -- Italy, India and Indonesia, but not Iraq because that would totally be a drag. Along the way, she eats, prays and loves, which explains the title, and says things like:
"I'm having a relationship with my pizza."
"Pain is a gift. Pain is the road to transformation."
"It won't last forever. Nothing does."
Again, all so true, though I was beginning to think that one thing that would last forever was the movie. In the end, though, Julia finally finds happiness with Javier Bardem, who is not quite as creepy as he was in No Country for Old Men.
I walked out of the theatre a changed man. I totally got the message of the movie, which was: "To find spiritual fulfilment and love, if you don't like where you are, be somewhere else, and bring travellers cheques."
So, on the way home, I decided I would fly off to Bali, or possibly Vegas, and look for love and spiritual enlightenment. When I got home, I went up to my wife and I said:
"I don't know how to be here any more."
That's when she hit me in the face with a frying pan, and I saw God.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Hot Canadian Jessie
If you're interested in Canadian Jessie from Toronto, you might want to check out her website.
Who knew? Do you think she was on Jake's season for the "right reasons"?
http://jessiesulidis.com/
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
More insight into the behind the scenes of The Bachelor
Rozlyn Papa was interviewed by Richmond Magazine.
Richmond Magazine
Some very interesting info about the show ie
Q:When you signed up for The Bachelor, did you think at all that you’d meet someone you’d have a relationship with?
A: When I signed up, they said [the competition is] between three guys: It’s going to be either Kipton, Reid or Jake. I never watched the show, so my sister and I YouTubed them. I talked to the producer, [who asked], “Is there any one that you like?” And I said, “Kipton and Reid, but I’m not interested in Jake.” And then, just before I left, they said it’s going to be Jake, and I said I’m not interested. They said, “Oh, it’s fine, just see what happens.”
They didn’t care that I wasn’t interested in him. So, for them to criticize me and say that I wasn’t there for the right reasons — they already knew that I wasn’t going to fall in love with this guy and that I wasn’t attracted to him. They’re not interested in that. They don’t care about people falling in love; they care about the ratings and the drama.
They have story-writers. Everything is very calculated. They knew going in that I wasn’t interested in this guy, but they cast me anyway. They were very much pursuing me to be on the show. It wasn’t the other way around.
and
Q: Do you think they planned to cast you as the villain?
A: Absolutely. Everybody on the show — unbeknownst to the cast — has a cast sheet. I wasn’t supposed to see this, but because I made friends with one of the producers, I saw my own. So, it gives your background information, your likes and dislikes and insecurities. I mentioned to somebody, “Oh, I’ve got skinny legs, and that makes me self-conscious.” They have that on there; they want to exploit the things that make you insecure.
And they also said that I was going to be this season’s Wes [a Bachelorette contestant who confessed to having a girlfriend at home]. So before I even got to the show, my cast sheet said I was going to be this season’s Wes and that I wasn’t going to get along with the other girls. That was my story line.
They can’t control everything; they can’t control what you do, but they have a basic guideline of how they want the season to play out.
There’s 25 girls [at the Bachelor mansion] the first night [of the show]. You get to L.A. a couple of days before filming starts and do the photo shoots and everything, but they actually fly out about 30 girls. And every single one of those 30 girls thinks they’re definitely on the show. In reality, five of those girls are backup girls. In case somebody backs out or won’t do what they want them to do, they’ve got replacements. They want to see who’s going to be dramatic enough for the camera and if they’re going to follow directions
__________________
Richmond Magazine
Some very interesting info about the show ie
Q:When you signed up for The Bachelor, did you think at all that you’d meet someone you’d have a relationship with?
A: When I signed up, they said [the competition is] between three guys: It’s going to be either Kipton, Reid or Jake. I never watched the show, so my sister and I YouTubed them. I talked to the producer, [who asked], “Is there any one that you like?” And I said, “Kipton and Reid, but I’m not interested in Jake.” And then, just before I left, they said it’s going to be Jake, and I said I’m not interested. They said, “Oh, it’s fine, just see what happens.”
They didn’t care that I wasn’t interested in him. So, for them to criticize me and say that I wasn’t there for the right reasons — they already knew that I wasn’t going to fall in love with this guy and that I wasn’t attracted to him. They’re not interested in that. They don’t care about people falling in love; they care about the ratings and the drama.
They have story-writers. Everything is very calculated. They knew going in that I wasn’t interested in this guy, but they cast me anyway. They were very much pursuing me to be on the show. It wasn’t the other way around.
and
Q: Do you think they planned to cast you as the villain?
A: Absolutely. Everybody on the show — unbeknownst to the cast — has a cast sheet. I wasn’t supposed to see this, but because I made friends with one of the producers, I saw my own. So, it gives your background information, your likes and dislikes and insecurities. I mentioned to somebody, “Oh, I’ve got skinny legs, and that makes me self-conscious.” They have that on there; they want to exploit the things that make you insecure.
And they also said that I was going to be this season’s Wes [a Bachelorette contestant who confessed to having a girlfriend at home]. So before I even got to the show, my cast sheet said I was going to be this season’s Wes and that I wasn’t going to get along with the other girls. That was my story line.
They can’t control everything; they can’t control what you do, but they have a basic guideline of how they want the season to play out.
There’s 25 girls [at the Bachelor mansion] the first night [of the show]. You get to L.A. a couple of days before filming starts and do the photo shoots and everything, but they actually fly out about 30 girls. And every single one of those 30 girls thinks they’re definitely on the show. In reality, five of those girls are backup girls. In case somebody backs out or won’t do what they want them to do, they’ve got replacements. They want to see who’s going to be dramatic enough for the camera and if they’re going to follow directions
__________________
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Marianna's Musings: Ali's Episode 9
MARIANNA'S MUSINGS
This week, my musings come with a questionnaire.
1. WHO WAS THE BETTER ACTOR?
Unless being in "the bachelor bubble" has really messed with their sanity, the bachelors appeared to be following Fleissian production orders as they tried their hand at a little "acting".
Chris gazed goofily into the distant horizon, smiling and slowly nodding to himself. Had he magically transported himself to the land of unicorns and rainbows? Or perhaps he was receiving a message from his mother?
Roberto took time out from packing his suitcase to lie on his hotel bed and twirl a baseball, smiling secretly all the while. Was he reliving his Hometown Date? His last home run? Perhaps his last home-cooked meal?
Frank adopted a tortured moue as he paced the streets of downtown Chicago, scaring children, small dogs and assorted hobbits in his way. Was he thinking more of Ali or Nicole?
2. WOULD YOU BUY FRANK'S SCREENPLAY?
Frank's latest screenplay traces the saga of a man who goes back to his hometown to find his true love, at the risk of hurting the girl he's currently with.
Here are the opening lines, which he recited for us during his voiceover.
"My stomach is at my feet. My heart is in my throat. Mike Fleiss is on my back. My screenwriting career is in the toilet. Nicole's in a hotel room in Chicago. Ali's in a hut in Tahiti. My chest is out of my shirt."
What do you think? An instant hit?
3. WHO WON THE BLINKING CONTEST?
Nicole and Frank stared silently at each other, apparently concentrating on going as long as they could without blinking. But who won?
The winner will advance to the next round: a stare-off against the biggest non-blinking reptilian: Mike Fleiss.
4. WHO PACKED THE MOST SENSIBLY?
Was it Chris, who didn't believe in cluttering up his suitcase with neckties and formal wear?
Was it Roberto, who made room for a Lion King CD over anti-perspirant?
Or was it Frank, who came to Tahiti for a day to break up with Ali but brought 3 pieces of luggage -- presumably all bursting full of t-shirts dipping to his navel?
5. WHICH OF ALI'S LOOKS DID YOU LIKE BEST?
Was it sexy Ali, wearing a short, gauzy, low-cut dress during her dinner with Roberto?
Was it sporty Ali, clad in shorts and tank top for her date with Chris?
Or was it romantic Ali, with a flower adorning her hair, excitedly anticipating a sail ride with Frank but sadly getting the wind taken out of her sails instead.
6. BESIDES THE HEART-SHAPED ISLAND, WHICH OTHER SHAPES DID YOU SEE?
(With apologies to Rorschach)
Didn't the shapes of the sweat stains under Roberto's armpits look a bit like baseball trophies to you?
And those red spots on Chris' cheeks; didn't they seem uncannily to be in the shape of two unicorns, rocking on porch chairs?
And what about Frank? In the shadows cast by his man-cleavage, couldn't you just make out the letters of the Hollywood sign?
7. REPEAT OFFENDERS: WHAT IS STARTING TO IRRITATE YOU MORE THIS SEASON?
Is it the constant use of words such as "like", "amazing", "ridiculous" and "my journey" that punctuate 'bachspeak' ?
Or is it the overused theme of having a girlfriend back home?
8. WET BACHELOR VS DRY BACHELOR
Which bachelor's style of wading through water to get to a hut did you like the most?
Was it Roberto who didn't hesitate and got his shorts wet? Or was it Chris who had the foresight to hike them up and keep them dry?
9. WHAT'S YOUR HOUSEKEEPING STYLE?
Is it neat freak Nicole with her pristine hotel-like apartment, spotless and devoid of clutter, personal photos and knick knacks?
Or is it Ali who, by her own admission in her blog, shocked Roberto with a hut so messy that the floor was barely visible.
10. SHALLOW VS DEEP
What entertained you most: watching Chris and Roberto play with Ali in the shallow water or watching Frank go off the deep end?
11. WHAT WOULD MAKE YOU MORE LIKELY TO GO TO TAHITI?
What's the most attractive thing about Tahiti? The warm, azure ocean? The gorgeous tropical scenery? The exotic culture and cuisine?
Or is it that, apparently, just taking one walk on a Tahitian beach can mean coming home with a good start to a pearl necklace?
12. WHAT'S A GIRL TO DO BUT COLLAPSE?
It seems that, when in distress, Ali is only able to walk so far before collapsing.
Which was your favourite: her hotel corridoor collapse during Jake's season or this episode's collapse by the tree on the beach?
13. THE DOCTOR IS IN THE HUT
Who's your favourite tv relationship therapist: Dr. Phil or Dr. Chris?
What's next: Chris Harrison's own talk show, called "The Bachelor Padded Room", where he provides therapy and rehab for those who've appeared so frequently in various Fleiss productions that they can't remember their real identities anymore?
14. FANTASY SUITE 54
If Chris and Ali were in Fantasy Suite 54 and Ali and Roberto shared Fantasy Suite 53, who was that we caught a glimpse of in Fantasy Suite 55? Could it be....Nicole and Frank???!
15. DID YOU GET THE FEELING SOMETHING WAS MISSING?
You know what I'm talking about. "Ali. Gentlemen. Final rose tonight".
Come on, admit it. Didn't you feel just a little bit robbed?
This week, my musings come with a questionnaire.
1. WHO WAS THE BETTER ACTOR?
Unless being in "the bachelor bubble" has really messed with their sanity, the bachelors appeared to be following Fleissian production orders as they tried their hand at a little "acting".
Chris gazed goofily into the distant horizon, smiling and slowly nodding to himself. Had he magically transported himself to the land of unicorns and rainbows? Or perhaps he was receiving a message from his mother?
Roberto took time out from packing his suitcase to lie on his hotel bed and twirl a baseball, smiling secretly all the while. Was he reliving his Hometown Date? His last home run? Perhaps his last home-cooked meal?
Frank adopted a tortured moue as he paced the streets of downtown Chicago, scaring children, small dogs and assorted hobbits in his way. Was he thinking more of Ali or Nicole?
2. WOULD YOU BUY FRANK'S SCREENPLAY?
Frank's latest screenplay traces the saga of a man who goes back to his hometown to find his true love, at the risk of hurting the girl he's currently with.
Here are the opening lines, which he recited for us during his voiceover.
"My stomach is at my feet. My heart is in my throat. Mike Fleiss is on my back. My screenwriting career is in the toilet. Nicole's in a hotel room in Chicago. Ali's in a hut in Tahiti. My chest is out of my shirt."
What do you think? An instant hit?
3. WHO WON THE BLINKING CONTEST?
Nicole and Frank stared silently at each other, apparently concentrating on going as long as they could without blinking. But who won?
The winner will advance to the next round: a stare-off against the biggest non-blinking reptilian: Mike Fleiss.
4. WHO PACKED THE MOST SENSIBLY?
Was it Chris, who didn't believe in cluttering up his suitcase with neckties and formal wear?
Was it Roberto, who made room for a Lion King CD over anti-perspirant?
Or was it Frank, who came to Tahiti for a day to break up with Ali but brought 3 pieces of luggage -- presumably all bursting full of t-shirts dipping to his navel?
5. WHICH OF ALI'S LOOKS DID YOU LIKE BEST?
Was it sexy Ali, wearing a short, gauzy, low-cut dress during her dinner with Roberto?
Was it sporty Ali, clad in shorts and tank top for her date with Chris?
Or was it romantic Ali, with a flower adorning her hair, excitedly anticipating a sail ride with Frank but sadly getting the wind taken out of her sails instead.
6. BESIDES THE HEART-SHAPED ISLAND, WHICH OTHER SHAPES DID YOU SEE?
(With apologies to Rorschach)
Didn't the shapes of the sweat stains under Roberto's armpits look a bit like baseball trophies to you?
And those red spots on Chris' cheeks; didn't they seem uncannily to be in the shape of two unicorns, rocking on porch chairs?
And what about Frank? In the shadows cast by his man-cleavage, couldn't you just make out the letters of the Hollywood sign?
7. REPEAT OFFENDERS: WHAT IS STARTING TO IRRITATE YOU MORE THIS SEASON?
Is it the constant use of words such as "like", "amazing", "ridiculous" and "my journey" that punctuate 'bachspeak' ?
Or is it the overused theme of having a girlfriend back home?
8. WET BACHELOR VS DRY BACHELOR
Which bachelor's style of wading through water to get to a hut did you like the most?
Was it Roberto who didn't hesitate and got his shorts wet? Or was it Chris who had the foresight to hike them up and keep them dry?
9. WHAT'S YOUR HOUSEKEEPING STYLE?
Is it neat freak Nicole with her pristine hotel-like apartment, spotless and devoid of clutter, personal photos and knick knacks?
Or is it Ali who, by her own admission in her blog, shocked Roberto with a hut so messy that the floor was barely visible.
10. SHALLOW VS DEEP
What entertained you most: watching Chris and Roberto play with Ali in the shallow water or watching Frank go off the deep end?
11. WHAT WOULD MAKE YOU MORE LIKELY TO GO TO TAHITI?
What's the most attractive thing about Tahiti? The warm, azure ocean? The gorgeous tropical scenery? The exotic culture and cuisine?
Or is it that, apparently, just taking one walk on a Tahitian beach can mean coming home with a good start to a pearl necklace?
12. WHAT'S A GIRL TO DO BUT COLLAPSE?
It seems that, when in distress, Ali is only able to walk so far before collapsing.
Which was your favourite: her hotel corridoor collapse during Jake's season or this episode's collapse by the tree on the beach?
13. THE DOCTOR IS IN THE HUT
Who's your favourite tv relationship therapist: Dr. Phil or Dr. Chris?
What's next: Chris Harrison's own talk show, called "The Bachelor Padded Room", where he provides therapy and rehab for those who've appeared so frequently in various Fleiss productions that they can't remember their real identities anymore?
14. FANTASY SUITE 54
If Chris and Ali were in Fantasy Suite 54 and Ali and Roberto shared Fantasy Suite 53, who was that we caught a glimpse of in Fantasy Suite 55? Could it be....Nicole and Frank???!
15. DID YOU GET THE FEELING SOMETHING WAS MISSING?
You know what I'm talking about. "Ali. Gentlemen. Final rose tonight".
Come on, admit it. Didn't you feel just a little bit robbed?
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Marianna's Musings: Ali's Episode 8
Chris Harrison, with his "Most Dramatic Ever" line, can't hold a candle to these daring or dubious distinctions:
MOST SEXY MOMENT EVER
I know, I know. The Fantasy Suite overnight dates may blow this moment out of the water. For now, though, Roberto standing behind Ali while teaching her how to bat was muy caliente.
He could have easily gotten to 3rd base right then and there if he'd wanted to.
MOST SEXIST MOMENT EVER
Roberto's dad has a lot of "concerns" because Ali will be so busy running her business that she may not "support" Roberto.
Ali gives a good answer about a happy marriage needing two fulfilled people. Roberto Sr. looks largely unconvinced.
MOST DOUBTFUL PARENT EVER
Roberto Sr. thinks his son is a "big prize". Everyone takes a few moments to go worship the trophies at the shrine of Roberto Jr. Pater familias is clearly worried that his son may not be happy with Ali.
Of course, in a Fleiss-induced moment of speedy clarity, he has an abrupt change of heart and gives his "blessings" as precipitously as Jake's family did with Vienna.
You know, sometimes it's just better to go with your first impression, isn't it.
MOST KLEENEX USED EVER
Chris' father talks about meeting his wife, losing his wife and the importance of family.
Tears run unashamedly down the cheeks of America.
Fleiss cannot believe his luck at having found the holy trinity of love, loss and loyalty.
MOST IRONIC SLOGAN EVER
'''Love is the only reality' is the slogan we live by," says Chris' wise dad.
Fleiss begs to differ. Details to follow later this summer on The Bachelor Pad.
MOST TOUCHING PARALLELS EVER
Chris quits his job to nurse his dying mother.
Ali quits her job to nurse her dying grandmother.
Frank quits his job to nurse his dying enthusiasm for the reality show process.
MOST ANIMALS IN ANY SEASON EVER
Not counting our taxidermy tour, we've had a Disneyfied mouse feeding off crumbs in the Bachelor house.
We've had a hungry stray kitty feeding off table scraps in Portugal.
And now, we have a wet and winsome black lab feeding off the attention of the camera crew in the front yard as she largely ignores her master's commands.
Come on, now, Chris Harrison. How can you say "we don't care about the dog?"
MOST UNCONVENTIONAL GREETING EVER
"So Ali, would you like to see my basement?" says Kirk's father barely five minutes after meeting her.
MOST HOSPITABLE DEAD SQUIRREL EVER
A stuffed squirrel sits jauntily in the liviing room, offering a juicy strawberry to all those who cross the DeWindt family threshold.
MOST SELF-EVIDENT LINE EVER
"KIrk he hasn't brought very many gals home," says Kirk's dad, offering Ali an elk-foot popsicle from his freezer.
Gee... I wonder why.
MOST FOREBODING DINNER CONVERSATION EVER
Kirk's dad to Kirk's previous girlfriend: "More venison?"
Kirk's girlfriend: "Oh, no thanks, I'm stuffed."
Kirk's dad: "Hmmm... that gives me an idea..."
MOST BATTLING BRACELETS IN A SEASON EVER
Kirk's mother-son LiveStrong bracelets vs. the Dennis bracelet it is decreed all Lambton women (present, past and future) must wear.
MOST MISSING CHEESE EVER
Uncharacteristically, Kirk's grandmother's cheesy potatoes were the cheesiest thing about this week's episode.
Lactose-intolerant bach fans everywhere rejoiced.
MOST MAN-CLEAVAGE EVER
In a desperate effort to seduce Ali and have her eliminate the competition, Frank wears a revealing low-cut top.
MOST LIKELY BACHELORETTE TO BE LIVING WITH IN-LAWS EVER
Two of the remaining three bachelors declare that she'd fit right in with the family and immediately start shopping for a bigger bed for their childhood rooms.
MOST PASSIVE MOMS EVER
Ironically, it was Chris' dead mother who made her presence felt the most during the home town visits.
Roberto's "passive" mother and Kirk's non-responsive step-mother shrunk in the shadows of their larger-than-life spouses.
MOST REVEALING REALITY MOMENT EVER
Ali realizes that her strong feelings for Jake last season were indeed a result of the 'Bachelor Love Bubble'.
Consequently, she is pointedly non-committal when Chris Harrison asks her if one of the remaining men could be her husband.
Good job, Ali, for not rabbiting on about how her husband is definitely there and how this process really works, yada, yada, yada. Eitther you're being refreshingly honest or you never became the bachelorette intending to find your husband.
MOST ROSES EVER
Not only does Ali have three roses to give out, she also has two dozen attached to her dress.
That way, if none of the remaining men turns out to be husband material, she can always wear that dress to her next social event, plucking the roses off it to distribute to the potential partners among the passers-by.
MOST SIGNATURE EXPRESSIONS EVER
Ali seems to have three signature expressions: the heartbroken pout, the forehead-wrinkling worried look and the wide-eyed and plastered smile look of discomfort and pretense.
She has recently been perfecting her pout at all Rose Ceremonies.
MOST EQUIVOCAL THANK-YOU EVER
Kirk to Ali: "Thanks, I guess. I gave all of myself to you and it's just not what you're looking for."
Kirk to self: "Oh why oh why didn't I tell my dad we'd meet him at the nearest AppleBee's?"
MOST SEXY MOMENT EVER
I know, I know. The Fantasy Suite overnight dates may blow this moment out of the water. For now, though, Roberto standing behind Ali while teaching her how to bat was muy caliente.
He could have easily gotten to 3rd base right then and there if he'd wanted to.
MOST SEXIST MOMENT EVER
Roberto's dad has a lot of "concerns" because Ali will be so busy running her business that she may not "support" Roberto.
Ali gives a good answer about a happy marriage needing two fulfilled people. Roberto Sr. looks largely unconvinced.
MOST DOUBTFUL PARENT EVER
Roberto Sr. thinks his son is a "big prize". Everyone takes a few moments to go worship the trophies at the shrine of Roberto Jr. Pater familias is clearly worried that his son may not be happy with Ali.
Of course, in a Fleiss-induced moment of speedy clarity, he has an abrupt change of heart and gives his "blessings" as precipitously as Jake's family did with Vienna.
You know, sometimes it's just better to go with your first impression, isn't it.
MOST KLEENEX USED EVER
Chris' father talks about meeting his wife, losing his wife and the importance of family.
Tears run unashamedly down the cheeks of America.
Fleiss cannot believe his luck at having found the holy trinity of love, loss and loyalty.
MOST IRONIC SLOGAN EVER
'''Love is the only reality' is the slogan we live by," says Chris' wise dad.
Fleiss begs to differ. Details to follow later this summer on The Bachelor Pad.
MOST TOUCHING PARALLELS EVER
Chris quits his job to nurse his dying mother.
Ali quits her job to nurse her dying grandmother.
Frank quits his job to nurse his dying enthusiasm for the reality show process.
MOST ANIMALS IN ANY SEASON EVER
Not counting our taxidermy tour, we've had a Disneyfied mouse feeding off crumbs in the Bachelor house.
We've had a hungry stray kitty feeding off table scraps in Portugal.
And now, we have a wet and winsome black lab feeding off the attention of the camera crew in the front yard as she largely ignores her master's commands.
Come on, now, Chris Harrison. How can you say "we don't care about the dog?"
MOST UNCONVENTIONAL GREETING EVER
"So Ali, would you like to see my basement?" says Kirk's father barely five minutes after meeting her.
MOST HOSPITABLE DEAD SQUIRREL EVER
A stuffed squirrel sits jauntily in the liviing room, offering a juicy strawberry to all those who cross the DeWindt family threshold.
MOST SELF-EVIDENT LINE EVER
"KIrk he hasn't brought very many gals home," says Kirk's dad, offering Ali an elk-foot popsicle from his freezer.
Gee... I wonder why.
MOST FOREBODING DINNER CONVERSATION EVER
Kirk's dad to Kirk's previous girlfriend: "More venison?"
Kirk's girlfriend: "Oh, no thanks, I'm stuffed."
Kirk's dad: "Hmmm... that gives me an idea..."
MOST BATTLING BRACELETS IN A SEASON EVER
Kirk's mother-son LiveStrong bracelets vs. the Dennis bracelet it is decreed all Lambton women (present, past and future) must wear.
MOST MISSING CHEESE EVER
Uncharacteristically, Kirk's grandmother's cheesy potatoes were the cheesiest thing about this week's episode.
Lactose-intolerant bach fans everywhere rejoiced.
MOST MAN-CLEAVAGE EVER
In a desperate effort to seduce Ali and have her eliminate the competition, Frank wears a revealing low-cut top.
MOST LIKELY BACHELORETTE TO BE LIVING WITH IN-LAWS EVER
Two of the remaining three bachelors declare that she'd fit right in with the family and immediately start shopping for a bigger bed for their childhood rooms.
MOST PASSIVE MOMS EVER
Ironically, it was Chris' dead mother who made her presence felt the most during the home town visits.
Roberto's "passive" mother and Kirk's non-responsive step-mother shrunk in the shadows of their larger-than-life spouses.
MOST REVEALING REALITY MOMENT EVER
Ali realizes that her strong feelings for Jake last season were indeed a result of the 'Bachelor Love Bubble'.
Consequently, she is pointedly non-committal when Chris Harrison asks her if one of the remaining men could be her husband.
Good job, Ali, for not rabbiting on about how her husband is definitely there and how this process really works, yada, yada, yada. Eitther you're being refreshingly honest or you never became the bachelorette intending to find your husband.
MOST ROSES EVER
Not only does Ali have three roses to give out, she also has two dozen attached to her dress.
That way, if none of the remaining men turns out to be husband material, she can always wear that dress to her next social event, plucking the roses off it to distribute to the potential partners among the passers-by.
MOST SIGNATURE EXPRESSIONS EVER
Ali seems to have three signature expressions: the heartbroken pout, the forehead-wrinkling worried look and the wide-eyed and plastered smile look of discomfort and pretense.
She has recently been perfecting her pout at all Rose Ceremonies.
MOST EQUIVOCAL THANK-YOU EVER
Kirk to Ali: "Thanks, I guess. I gave all of myself to you and it's just not what you're looking for."
Kirk to self: "Oh why oh why didn't I tell my dad we'd meet him at the nearest AppleBee's?"
Saturday, July 10, 2010
At the end of the day, being a jerk isn't going to get you anywhere in Hollywood.
This from PopEater, AOL's on line celebrity mag:
http://www.popeater.com/2010/07/10/jake-pavelka-vienna-girardi/
We want to take a moment and write Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi a quick memo on fame whoring. In order to be a successful fame whore, the kind of fame whore that can ultimately take that whoring to a new level and turn it into a career (i.e. Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton, Kate Gosselin, Kendra Wilkinson), you have to find a way to make yourself likable. Because with likability comes brandability and with brandability comes ever more opportunities to gain increasing levels of faux celebrity.
Jake and Vienna have gone about this all wrong with their public feuding and overall nastiness. It's a lesson that Jon and Kate Gosselin learned early in their divorce. The public turns against you when you get too mean.
PopEater's own Naughty But Nice Rob Shuter was even disgusted by the pair (And it takes a lot to disgust Mr. Shuter).
"After that interview their brand is worth less than BP!" Shuter exclaimed when we asked him about the pair. "It was a disaster. They both are done! It's so sad when two people we think we know turn out to be exact opposite! Not since the Britney meltdown have I had to readjust my opinion so much.
"Not that there is anything left of a celebrity career for either Jake or Vienna to really salvage, but if the two of them want some kind of future in the public eye, now would be the time for them to shut their traps and find a way to make themselves sympathetic characters.
They already have a tenuous grasp on celebrity. 'Bachelor' contestants have rarely been able to catapult themselves to the next level of faux fame. And save for Trista and Ryan, whom America loves because they seem nice and normal, most of them have dropped out of the public consciousness pretty quick.
"It took Trista and Ryan some time to achieve their level of fame and that happened because they were an anomaly. I don't think there was a whole lot of value to begin with for Jake and Vienna but what there was has been eroded by their behavior," explains Matt Delzell, a director with the celebrity licensing group at Davie Brown Entertainment, a marketing and branding firm. "To sustain brand value you have to show people you aren't just out for the fame and those two have proved otherwise."
And after their upsetting couch confrontation with Chris Harrison, both Jake and Vienna just seem so unlikable.
"There is an art to being famous for nothing. You MUST be likable, or have a scandal where you are the sympathetic character, or end up working with someone untouchable and beloved or be related to someone we adore (Nicole Richie) – this is why Spencer and Heidi didn't make a dime, why Octomom was shunned and why we adore Melissa Rycroft and Elizabeth Hasselbeck," explains 'Cult of Celebrity' author Cooper Lawrence. "Jake is a fame-seeking attention whore with no likable qualities and Vienna is worse. They aren't getting endorsement deals, book deals or anything that would make them big money because nobody would buy anything from them.
"So sadly for these two fame mongers, their fifteen minutes is about to be up. They could have stretched it into at least another 27 had they played their cards right, but at the end of the day, being a jerk isn't going to get you anywhere in Hollywood.
http://www.popeater.com/2010/07/10/jake-pavelka-vienna-girardi/
We want to take a moment and write Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi a quick memo on fame whoring. In order to be a successful fame whore, the kind of fame whore that can ultimately take that whoring to a new level and turn it into a career (i.e. Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton, Kate Gosselin, Kendra Wilkinson), you have to find a way to make yourself likable. Because with likability comes brandability and with brandability comes ever more opportunities to gain increasing levels of faux celebrity.
Jake and Vienna have gone about this all wrong with their public feuding and overall nastiness. It's a lesson that Jon and Kate Gosselin learned early in their divorce. The public turns against you when you get too mean.
PopEater's own Naughty But Nice Rob Shuter was even disgusted by the pair (And it takes a lot to disgust Mr. Shuter).
"After that interview their brand is worth less than BP!" Shuter exclaimed when we asked him about the pair. "It was a disaster. They both are done! It's so sad when two people we think we know turn out to be exact opposite! Not since the Britney meltdown have I had to readjust my opinion so much.
"Not that there is anything left of a celebrity career for either Jake or Vienna to really salvage, but if the two of them want some kind of future in the public eye, now would be the time for them to shut their traps and find a way to make themselves sympathetic characters.
They already have a tenuous grasp on celebrity. 'Bachelor' contestants have rarely been able to catapult themselves to the next level of faux fame. And save for Trista and Ryan, whom America loves because they seem nice and normal, most of them have dropped out of the public consciousness pretty quick.
"It took Trista and Ryan some time to achieve their level of fame and that happened because they were an anomaly. I don't think there was a whole lot of value to begin with for Jake and Vienna but what there was has been eroded by their behavior," explains Matt Delzell, a director with the celebrity licensing group at Davie Brown Entertainment, a marketing and branding firm. "To sustain brand value you have to show people you aren't just out for the fame and those two have proved otherwise."
And after their upsetting couch confrontation with Chris Harrison, both Jake and Vienna just seem so unlikable.
"There is an art to being famous for nothing. You MUST be likable, or have a scandal where you are the sympathetic character, or end up working with someone untouchable and beloved or be related to someone we adore (Nicole Richie) – this is why Spencer and Heidi didn't make a dime, why Octomom was shunned and why we adore Melissa Rycroft and Elizabeth Hasselbeck," explains 'Cult of Celebrity' author Cooper Lawrence. "Jake is a fame-seeking attention whore with no likable qualities and Vienna is worse. They aren't getting endorsement deals, book deals or anything that would make them big money because nobody would buy anything from them.
"So sadly for these two fame mongers, their fifteen minutes is about to be up. They could have stretched it into at least another 27 had they played their cards right, but at the end of the day, being a jerk isn't going to get you anywhere in Hollywood.
Saturday, Jul 10, 2010 11:01 ET
This week in crazy: Jake Pavelka
The former "Bachelor" was mean and snippy to his ex Vienna, but nothing says "nutso" like looking for love on TV
By Mary Elizabeth Williams
Reuters
We've long suspected that starring on a show with a dubious track record like "The Bachelor" is an indication of possible wackness. But this week, Jake Pavelka took it to a whole other level.
Tenley must sure be feeling like she dodged a bullet these days. After not quite winning Pavelka's heart last March, she went back to being just another freelance bachelorette. It was love-her-or-hate-her contender Vienna Girardi who got the rose-strewn, tears-inducing proposal, the underwhelming declaration from her man on the cover of People that "I didn't make a mistake." It was she who got to watch as Pavelka went on to bust assorted moves on "Dancing With the Stars," she who uprooted herself to Los Angeles to be near him. Gee, what could wrong?
Then, faster than you can say, "I'm selling my story to the tabloids," the romance went south. There were accusations of infidelity from him and "intimacy issues" from her. What? A "Bachelor" engagement that went bust? Shut up. On Monday, it all culminated in the most! tense! reunion! ever! with the two estranged lovebirds going at it on a Very Special episode of "The Bachelorette."
Far be it for us to suggest that Vienna came off looking like the person we'd most want to share our headstone with, but Jake? He really outdid himself. Registering his "disgust" at the woman he described on a March episode of "Good Morning Texas" as "everything I've ever wanted and so much more," he went from the Aw, shucks breakup guy who insisted, "I'm still processing" and "I'm in a really confused emotional state" to Mr. Anger Issues once Vienna starting pushing his numerous buttons.
What was it about Jake's performance that creeped us out so? The admission that he ripped her GPS out of her hand and threw it in the back seat when she had the temerity to second-guess his directions? His snotty, "And another interruption!" when she cut in on one of his disses? His chilly excuse, when she called him out on his lack of affection, "There's more in a relationship than sex or intimacy," and the weirdly "Big Love"-like follow-up: "What guy in America would ever want to be intimate with a woman that undermines him… emasculates and doesn't respect [him]?" All of that, for sure. But mostly it was the unnervingly Patrick Batemanesque gritted smile he returned to again and again, with detours into stony silence when she described him as "someone who was emotionally and physically not there with me," and an outraged "Stop interrupting me!" as she burst into tears, that made us want to disinfect the inside of our television.
Sure, Vienna seems like a lady for whom the term "high maintenance" might have been coined. But you picked her, Jake. You went on national television in your quest to find her. Then you forfeited your conjugal duties in favor of prime-time waltzing competitions and GPS-induced tantrums. And for the pièce de resistance, Prince Charming, you reminded us how people who grin like that when they're really, really angry give us very bad dreams. You're not the first Bachelor, and you won't be the last. But dude, you're definitely the craziest.
This week in crazy: Jake Pavelka
The former "Bachelor" was mean and snippy to his ex Vienna, but nothing says "nutso" like looking for love on TV
By Mary Elizabeth Williams
Reuters
We've long suspected that starring on a show with a dubious track record like "The Bachelor" is an indication of possible wackness. But this week, Jake Pavelka took it to a whole other level.
Tenley must sure be feeling like she dodged a bullet these days. After not quite winning Pavelka's heart last March, she went back to being just another freelance bachelorette. It was love-her-or-hate-her contender Vienna Girardi who got the rose-strewn, tears-inducing proposal, the underwhelming declaration from her man on the cover of People that "I didn't make a mistake." It was she who got to watch as Pavelka went on to bust assorted moves on "Dancing With the Stars," she who uprooted herself to Los Angeles to be near him. Gee, what could wrong?
Then, faster than you can say, "I'm selling my story to the tabloids," the romance went south. There were accusations of infidelity from him and "intimacy issues" from her. What? A "Bachelor" engagement that went bust? Shut up. On Monday, it all culminated in the most! tense! reunion! ever! with the two estranged lovebirds going at it on a Very Special episode of "The Bachelorette."
Far be it for us to suggest that Vienna came off looking like the person we'd most want to share our headstone with, but Jake? He really outdid himself. Registering his "disgust" at the woman he described on a March episode of "Good Morning Texas" as "everything I've ever wanted and so much more," he went from the Aw, shucks breakup guy who insisted, "I'm still processing" and "I'm in a really confused emotional state" to Mr. Anger Issues once Vienna starting pushing his numerous buttons.
What was it about Jake's performance that creeped us out so? The admission that he ripped her GPS out of her hand and threw it in the back seat when she had the temerity to second-guess his directions? His snotty, "And another interruption!" when she cut in on one of his disses? His chilly excuse, when she called him out on his lack of affection, "There's more in a relationship than sex or intimacy," and the weirdly "Big Love"-like follow-up: "What guy in America would ever want to be intimate with a woman that undermines him… emasculates and doesn't respect [him]?" All of that, for sure. But mostly it was the unnervingly Patrick Batemanesque gritted smile he returned to again and again, with detours into stony silence when she described him as "someone who was emotionally and physically not there with me," and an outraged "Stop interrupting me!" as she burst into tears, that made us want to disinfect the inside of our television.
Sure, Vienna seems like a lady for whom the term "high maintenance" might have been coined. But you picked her, Jake. You went on national television in your quest to find her. Then you forfeited your conjugal duties in favor of prime-time waltzing competitions and GPS-induced tantrums. And for the pièce de resistance, Prince Charming, you reminded us how people who grin like that when they're really, really angry give us very bad dreams. You're not the first Bachelor, and you won't be the last. But dude, you're definitely the craziest.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Marianna's Musings: Ali's Episode 7
In honour of the childish behaviour we witnessed during the Jake-Vienna interview, this week we have....
THE BACHELORETTE: MOTHER GOOSE EDITION
I'M THE KING OF THE CASTLE
Ali invites Roberto on a date to be the king of her castle. Frantic Frank immediately begins to plot about how he can dig a moat so deep that Roberto never makes it anywhere near Ali's buttress.
But Roberto finds the drawbridge (the one in Lisbon is apparently just like the one in San Francisco!) and he spends the date kissing aforementioned buttress.
ALI AND FRANK, SITTING IN A TREE, K-I-S-S-I-N-G
During part of the Most Awkward 2 on 1 Date Ever, Frank and Ali make out in a tree, while speaking Bachelorese to each other.
Luckily, Chris Harrison comes along with an English/Bachelorese dictionary.
Translation: If Ali thinks she's afraid of what she feels for Frank now, she's going to be twice as shooken up when she sees what's to come. Supposably.
THE GINGERHAIRED MAN
On his date, Kirk tells Ali he hasn't brought a woman home to meet his parents in three years and generally breaks up with his girlfriends within a year.
That's 'cause he runs, he runs, as fast as he can. They can't catch him; he's the gingerhaired man.
ALI HAD A LITTLE LAMB-TON
Chris motors along slowly and steadily-- on the scooter and in his relationship with Ali. He gets the last date before the Rose Ceremony, which he sees as strategically valuable.
He has also kept his gift for Ali until the time is right. He offers her a silver custom-made bracelet, complete with an engraving of his dead mother's signature.
Never mind that his mother's getting to see more of the world on Ali's season than Tenley's ex-husband did on Jake's season. It's jewellery, after all, and it earns him a roll on the grass with Ali and the first rose in the Rose Ceremony.
IT'S RAINING, IT'S POURING, THE VIEWERS ARE SNORING
Ty is much less tickled about being turfed than he his about the good woman working 9 to 5.
Ali walks out in the rain with him. The rainbow stripes on her dress are, unfortunately, not colourfast and she returns to the mansion, a hodgepodge of hues. The black roots in her blond hair join the colourful cacophony.
Unfortunately, this is the only colourful moment in an otherwise clichéd, corny and conventional episode.
All that remains is for Chris Harrison to pop in to pronounce Ali the Most Lackadaisical Bachelorette Ever.
DOE, A DEER, A FEMALE DEER
Next week, Ali visits Kirk's house, where his dad treats her to a tour of the heads of all Kirk's ex-girlfriends, stuffed and mounted on the wall.
THE BACHELORETTE: MOTHER GOOSE EDITION
I'M THE KING OF THE CASTLE
Ali invites Roberto on a date to be the king of her castle. Frantic Frank immediately begins to plot about how he can dig a moat so deep that Roberto never makes it anywhere near Ali's buttress.
But Roberto finds the drawbridge (the one in Lisbon is apparently just like the one in San Francisco!) and he spends the date kissing aforementioned buttress.
ALI AND FRANK, SITTING IN A TREE, K-I-S-S-I-N-G
During part of the Most Awkward 2 on 1 Date Ever, Frank and Ali make out in a tree, while speaking Bachelorese to each other.
Luckily, Chris Harrison comes along with an English/Bachelorese dictionary.
Translation: If Ali thinks she's afraid of what she feels for Frank now, she's going to be twice as shooken up when she sees what's to come. Supposably.
THE GINGERHAIRED MAN
On his date, Kirk tells Ali he hasn't brought a woman home to meet his parents in three years and generally breaks up with his girlfriends within a year.
That's 'cause he runs, he runs, as fast as he can. They can't catch him; he's the gingerhaired man.
ALI HAD A LITTLE LAMB-TON
Chris motors along slowly and steadily-- on the scooter and in his relationship with Ali. He gets the last date before the Rose Ceremony, which he sees as strategically valuable.
He has also kept his gift for Ali until the time is right. He offers her a silver custom-made bracelet, complete with an engraving of his dead mother's signature.
Never mind that his mother's getting to see more of the world on Ali's season than Tenley's ex-husband did on Jake's season. It's jewellery, after all, and it earns him a roll on the grass with Ali and the first rose in the Rose Ceremony.
IT'S RAINING, IT'S POURING, THE VIEWERS ARE SNORING
Ty is much less tickled about being turfed than he his about the good woman working 9 to 5.
Ali walks out in the rain with him. The rainbow stripes on her dress are, unfortunately, not colourfast and she returns to the mansion, a hodgepodge of hues. The black roots in her blond hair join the colourful cacophony.
Unfortunately, this is the only colourful moment in an otherwise clichéd, corny and conventional episode.
All that remains is for Chris Harrison to pop in to pronounce Ali the Most Lackadaisical Bachelorette Ever.
DOE, A DEER, A FEMALE DEER
Next week, Ali visits Kirk's house, where his dad treats her to a tour of the heads of all Kirk's ex-girlfriends, stuffed and mounted on the wall.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Ed's Blog is up
http://www.swiderski.info/
Not looking good for JED but I must say, they are handling things WAY better than Jake and Vienna. A new low for the Bachelor franchise, in my opinion.
I was on vacation for 9 days. Seems like I missed a lot!?!
Not looking good for JED but I must say, they are handling things WAY better than Jake and Vienna. A new low for the Bachelor franchise, in my opinion.
I was on vacation for 9 days. Seems like I missed a lot!?!
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN, JAKE PAVELKA SPEAKING
Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain, Jake Pavelka speaking. I'd like to welcome you aboard Flight 666 today.
Our flight time should be 1 hour and 45 minutes, which, coincidentally, is about how long most of my relationships have lasted.
Our cruising altitude will be exactly 39,000 feet. No need to take out a tape measure, ladies and gentlemen, I've got it all under control. Last night I came out here and measured it myself, so that I could give you the exact specifications.
Today, our flight is non-stop L.A. via Hollywood, home of the stars and the celebrities, such as myself. In fact, I bet some of you remember me from The Bachelorette, The Bachelor, DWTS and Drop Dead Vienna....er...Diva.
Current conditions in Hollywood are 75 degrees, light winds, and broken clouds. Sorry, ladies and gentlemen, that I can't fix those clouds any more than I can all my broken relationships.
Our inflight meal today is skewered crow, followed by a savary humble pie (baked by the good woman at home) and, to finish, your dessert choice of pound cake or snow pudding.
Ladies and Gentlemen, please remain in your seats at all times. Failure to do so will result in a stern look from me, Jake Pavelka, pilot and Hollywood star.
And please, ladies and gentlemen, no interrupting me while I am speaking or I may be forced to come out of the cockpit and raise my hand to you. Please listen attentively and just let me get out my side of the announcement.
At any time, should cabin pressure change, please attempt to appear normal.
We may experience some turbulence along the way but, ladies and gentlemen, I wish to remind you that this is no reason to undermine me, Jake Pavelka, your reality star pilot.
On behalf of the crew -- uh, actually, who gives a *&!@ about the crew, ladies and gentlemen -- on behalf of me, Jake Pavelka, we hope you enjoy your fright today on Air Narcissus.
Our flight time should be 1 hour and 45 minutes, which, coincidentally, is about how long most of my relationships have lasted.
Our cruising altitude will be exactly 39,000 feet. No need to take out a tape measure, ladies and gentlemen, I've got it all under control. Last night I came out here and measured it myself, so that I could give you the exact specifications.
Today, our flight is non-stop L.A. via Hollywood, home of the stars and the celebrities, such as myself. In fact, I bet some of you remember me from The Bachelorette, The Bachelor, DWTS and Drop Dead Vienna....er...Diva.
Current conditions in Hollywood are 75 degrees, light winds, and broken clouds. Sorry, ladies and gentlemen, that I can't fix those clouds any more than I can all my broken relationships.
Our inflight meal today is skewered crow, followed by a savary humble pie (baked by the good woman at home) and, to finish, your dessert choice of pound cake or snow pudding.
Ladies and Gentlemen, please remain in your seats at all times. Failure to do so will result in a stern look from me, Jake Pavelka, pilot and Hollywood star.
And please, ladies and gentlemen, no interrupting me while I am speaking or I may be forced to come out of the cockpit and raise my hand to you. Please listen attentively and just let me get out my side of the announcement.
At any time, should cabin pressure change, please attempt to appear normal.
We may experience some turbulence along the way but, ladies and gentlemen, I wish to remind you that this is no reason to undermine me, Jake Pavelka, your reality star pilot.
On behalf of the crew -- uh, actually, who gives a *&!@ about the crew, ladies and gentlemen -- on behalf of me, Jake Pavelka, we hope you enjoy your fright today on Air Narcissus.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Marianna's Musings: Ali's Episode 6
JUSTIN TIME
In a remarkable display of convenience, coincidence and casting, Chris Harrison finds Ali in her hotel room, and, with no apparent consideration of time zones, calls Canada.
After the Most Dramatic Five Rings Ever, none other than (former Bachelor and current Bachelor Pad contestant) Jessie (Suldaris) answers the phone.
Jessie, who I thought was still on set of The Bachelor Pad, just happens to be sitting at home with Justin's girlfriend, also named Jessica.
Justin, Jessie, Jessica... and wait, there's ANOTHER girlfriend somewhere? What's her name? Jezebel? Why wasn't she in the room too? Maybe because Mike Fleiss can't stand not to embellish the truth?
In a moment of the Sisterhood of the Travelling Two-timer, Ali bonds instantly to the wronged girlfriend and they have a little fake-cry and sympathy moment together. To Justin, Ali shows her aggressive, sarcastic and potty-mouthed side, questioning his very manhood.
At first Justin is sullen, next, he sulks, then attempts to stalk off. This is made difficult by Chris Harrison, Mike Fleiss and several bulky crew members, who have managed to block him so that his only retreat is hopping over hedges and fleeing over fountains.
He hails a cab and gets in, only to discover that the driver is none other than... Kasey, who has trekked back from the glacier to teach Justin a lesson for not guarding and protecting Ali's heart.
Sadly, there is no camera in the cab to record what went on.
TY MASSAGE
Ali gets steamy-ish with southern gentleman Ty.
In a show of remarkable restraint (if one is to compare this to the hallmark "Hot tub Harris" scene with Jillian and Jason), they give each other massages (disappointingly, no one straddles anyone) while Ali tries to figure out if she likes Ty enough to keep him.
A big red flag goes up at dinnertime when Ty speaks out of both sides of his mouth, telling Ali he admires her ambition while his anecdotes of family and married life pay homage to the stay-at-home wife and mother.
Safe bet: Ambitious Ali and Traditional Ty will not be riding off into the sunset.
Still, for now, they are very cosy. Once back in the change room, Ali is surprised to find... Kasey, clutching a fresh pair of bandaids. He is here to guard and protect those nasty blisters Ali has on the back of her ankles.
RAPUNZEL, LET DOWN YOUR HAIR EXTENSIONS
On the group date, the men always have to pretend to search for a hidden Ali. Just follow the trail of the camera crew, guys!
This time, Ali is coyly concealed in a tall Turkish turret. The men call up to her and she lets down her impossibly long extensions for them to climb up.
If you look closely in between the turrets, you can spot Kasey, lurking nearby with a bottle of conditioner, true to his word to guard and protect her... hair.
POP-EYED AND OLIVE OIL
No sooner has Ali gotten rid of one slick wrestler, she now has to face five more!
This time, it's not the smear of scandal, the pommade of perfidy, which is making the bachelors slick, but rather the copious amounts of olive oil with which Ali liberally slathers their chiselled chests while assorted Turkish wrestlers wait nearby.
The men grunt and flail and throw each other to the ground, making eye-popping efforts to win a one-on-one date with Ali.
The least-chiselled man wins.
NO FIREWORKS FOR ALI
Craig loves Ali more than Ali loves Craig.
His expression gets more and more adoring as their date wears on but Ali keeps her distance. He moves in for a kiss; she hugs him back. He leans towards her, she keeps her distance, her hands clasped firmly together.
In the total absence of metaphorical fireworks for Ali, the literal fireworks go entirely to waste.
Luckily, Craig need not worry about one thing: While he is on his date with Ali, back in his corner of the room sits... Kasey, clutching Craig's oily-pants wrestling trophy in order to guard and protect it from Roberto, the oh so close runner up.
BAZAAR BEHAVIOUR
Frank and Ali stroll through a colourful Turkish spice bazaar . Belly-dancer Ali shakes her sequins. Frank a.k.a. The Great Karnak, looks on with wide-eyed appreciation. Bested by a wily salesman, he carries around a cumbersome and overpriced rug for the rest of the day.
After hearing the long list of pastries with pistachoes and various other ingredients, Frank teasingly asks the bakery owner if they happen to have anything with pistachoes. Without blinking an eye, the man patiently begins his demonstration again. Ali is in peals of laughter.
Shades of Jillian and Reid in the Spanish butcher shop, with a touch of "Soy Grande".
Although Frank's previous behaviour has been highly changeable, from obsessive to bitter, from lovestruck to distant, after their holiday postcard day and romantic dinner in a cistern, Ali proclaims that she has her old Frank back.
The gurgling sound you hear in the background is not the water of the cistern but Kasey, hiding in the shadows, agonizing about next week. Kasey's subtitles reveal that he knows that Frank is about to destroy Ali's previously guarded and protected heart.
MAGIC CARPET RIDE?
Frank may have bought a rug but is Ali about to have the rug pulled out from under her?
Is Frank going to disappear as fast as the proverbial fly-by-night carpet salesman, back to a place where he's not just on the fringe, competing with other guys for Ali's attentions? What kind of storyline is Fleiss weaving now? Have we seen this pattern before?
THE MOST DRAMATIC NON-EVENT EVER
Ali's had enough of the drama for one week. She calls off the cocktail party and, in the Speediest Rose Ceremony Ever, she tersely but regretfully bids adieu to a classy but crestfallen Craig.
Kasey, unbeknownst to all, however, has been waiting in the wings with a tray of drinks and for the chance to see Ali and his blood brothers again. Sadly, it is not to be. Kasey is devastated that Chris Harrison did absolutely nothing to guard and protect....the Cocktail Party.
And so, Ali toasts her remaining bachelors and announces the next destination: Portugal.
Kasey excitedly rushes off to his travel agent to make his reservations. He's heard that The Muppets are big in Portugal.
In a remarkable display of convenience, coincidence and casting, Chris Harrison finds Ali in her hotel room, and, with no apparent consideration of time zones, calls Canada.
After the Most Dramatic Five Rings Ever, none other than (former Bachelor and current Bachelor Pad contestant) Jessie (Suldaris) answers the phone.
Jessie, who I thought was still on set of The Bachelor Pad, just happens to be sitting at home with Justin's girlfriend, also named Jessica.
Justin, Jessie, Jessica... and wait, there's ANOTHER girlfriend somewhere? What's her name? Jezebel? Why wasn't she in the room too? Maybe because Mike Fleiss can't stand not to embellish the truth?
In a moment of the Sisterhood of the Travelling Two-timer, Ali bonds instantly to the wronged girlfriend and they have a little fake-cry and sympathy moment together. To Justin, Ali shows her aggressive, sarcastic and potty-mouthed side, questioning his very manhood.
At first Justin is sullen, next, he sulks, then attempts to stalk off. This is made difficult by Chris Harrison, Mike Fleiss and several bulky crew members, who have managed to block him so that his only retreat is hopping over hedges and fleeing over fountains.
He hails a cab and gets in, only to discover that the driver is none other than... Kasey, who has trekked back from the glacier to teach Justin a lesson for not guarding and protecting Ali's heart.
Sadly, there is no camera in the cab to record what went on.
TY MASSAGE
Ali gets steamy-ish with southern gentleman Ty.
In a show of remarkable restraint (if one is to compare this to the hallmark "Hot tub Harris" scene with Jillian and Jason), they give each other massages (disappointingly, no one straddles anyone) while Ali tries to figure out if she likes Ty enough to keep him.
A big red flag goes up at dinnertime when Ty speaks out of both sides of his mouth, telling Ali he admires her ambition while his anecdotes of family and married life pay homage to the stay-at-home wife and mother.
Safe bet: Ambitious Ali and Traditional Ty will not be riding off into the sunset.
Still, for now, they are very cosy. Once back in the change room, Ali is surprised to find... Kasey, clutching a fresh pair of bandaids. He is here to guard and protect those nasty blisters Ali has on the back of her ankles.
RAPUNZEL, LET DOWN YOUR HAIR EXTENSIONS
On the group date, the men always have to pretend to search for a hidden Ali. Just follow the trail of the camera crew, guys!
This time, Ali is coyly concealed in a tall Turkish turret. The men call up to her and she lets down her impossibly long extensions for them to climb up.
If you look closely in between the turrets, you can spot Kasey, lurking nearby with a bottle of conditioner, true to his word to guard and protect her... hair.
POP-EYED AND OLIVE OIL
No sooner has Ali gotten rid of one slick wrestler, she now has to face five more!
This time, it's not the smear of scandal, the pommade of perfidy, which is making the bachelors slick, but rather the copious amounts of olive oil with which Ali liberally slathers their chiselled chests while assorted Turkish wrestlers wait nearby.
The men grunt and flail and throw each other to the ground, making eye-popping efforts to win a one-on-one date with Ali.
The least-chiselled man wins.
NO FIREWORKS FOR ALI
Craig loves Ali more than Ali loves Craig.
His expression gets more and more adoring as their date wears on but Ali keeps her distance. He moves in for a kiss; she hugs him back. He leans towards her, she keeps her distance, her hands clasped firmly together.
In the total absence of metaphorical fireworks for Ali, the literal fireworks go entirely to waste.
Luckily, Craig need not worry about one thing: While he is on his date with Ali, back in his corner of the room sits... Kasey, clutching Craig's oily-pants wrestling trophy in order to guard and protect it from Roberto, the oh so close runner up.
BAZAAR BEHAVIOUR
Frank and Ali stroll through a colourful Turkish spice bazaar . Belly-dancer Ali shakes her sequins. Frank a.k.a. The Great Karnak, looks on with wide-eyed appreciation. Bested by a wily salesman, he carries around a cumbersome and overpriced rug for the rest of the day.
After hearing the long list of pastries with pistachoes and various other ingredients, Frank teasingly asks the bakery owner if they happen to have anything with pistachoes. Without blinking an eye, the man patiently begins his demonstration again. Ali is in peals of laughter.
Shades of Jillian and Reid in the Spanish butcher shop, with a touch of "Soy Grande".
Although Frank's previous behaviour has been highly changeable, from obsessive to bitter, from lovestruck to distant, after their holiday postcard day and romantic dinner in a cistern, Ali proclaims that she has her old Frank back.
The gurgling sound you hear in the background is not the water of the cistern but Kasey, hiding in the shadows, agonizing about next week. Kasey's subtitles reveal that he knows that Frank is about to destroy Ali's previously guarded and protected heart.
MAGIC CARPET RIDE?
Frank may have bought a rug but is Ali about to have the rug pulled out from under her?
Is Frank going to disappear as fast as the proverbial fly-by-night carpet salesman, back to a place where he's not just on the fringe, competing with other guys for Ali's attentions? What kind of storyline is Fleiss weaving now? Have we seen this pattern before?
THE MOST DRAMATIC NON-EVENT EVER
Ali's had enough of the drama for one week. She calls off the cocktail party and, in the Speediest Rose Ceremony Ever, she tersely but regretfully bids adieu to a classy but crestfallen Craig.
Kasey, unbeknownst to all, however, has been waiting in the wings with a tray of drinks and for the chance to see Ali and his blood brothers again. Sadly, it is not to be. Kasey is devastated that Chris Harrison did absolutely nothing to guard and protect....the Cocktail Party.
And so, Ali toasts her remaining bachelors and announces the next destination: Portugal.
Kasey excitedly rushes off to his travel agent to make his reservations. He's heard that The Muppets are big in Portugal.
Interesting Article
I copied this from the BB. Thanks Chitown! I hope you don't mind, I think it was one to share here too.
Friday, June 25, 2010
Jake Pavelka: Vienna Girardi's no sex claim is "insane," I dumped her
Jake Pavelka: Vienna Girardi's no sex claim is "insane," I dumped her
By Christopher Rocchio, 06/24/2010
Jake Pavelka has labeled Vienna Girardi's claim that they split because he refused to be intimate with her as "insane."
"That's being dramatic and that's reaching," Pavelka told People in a cover story interview in the magazine's upcoming issue, according to Hollywood Life. "She has me mistaken for somebody else."
The Bachelor: On the Wings of Love couple issued a statement confirming their split on Monday night after Greek actor Gregory Michael said Girardi told him she was single and no longer with Pavelka when they met while attending a children's hospital prom near Los Angeles on Saturday and were subsequently seen kissing at a public beach party event in Santa Monica on Sunday.
It was later reported Pavelka that initiated the split because he felt Girardi was cheating with Michael, however he claims that was not the case.
"That is not what caused the breakup, but it's a factor," he told People. "I'm not going to be in a relationship that I don't fully trust."
While it might not have been the main cause of their split, Pavelka said he feels Girardi was unfaithful -- which she has denied.
"I'm not going to be surprised if more stuff comes out," Pavelka told People about Girardi's alleged infidelity. "I have no idea. I'm just putting my seatbelt on."
Instead, Pavelka claims he split from Girardi -- who has claimed that she was the one to end the relationship, not Pavelka -- because she sold her story to Star magazine, which published a cover story interview with Girardi this week.
"That seriously breaks my trust. I would never do that to her," he told People. "I am beside myself that she would dishonor the relationship like that."
Pavelka presented his final rose and a marriage proposal to Girardi -- and she accepted both during March's The Bachelor: On the Wings of Love finale broadcast, which filmed last fall. The couple subsequently told reporters they "definitely" would wed.
"For the skeptics out there, I followed my heart, and if I had to do it all over again, I would make the same decision over and over," he told People.
"I don't regret what I did."
Girardi's time as one of Pavelka's bachelorettes was a bumpy one -- as she was disliked by most of the season's other women and many viewers while also gaining tabloid attention for allegedly bilking her ex-husband out of thousands of dollars to pay for breast implants while he was deployed in Iraq.
"America couldn't stand that I chose her, and I'd defend her," Pavelka told People.
"For everything to come apart like this, I absolutely feel betrayed. I feel like I don't even know her."
In addition, Pavelka also described Girardi as unmotivated once they were together.
"[I told her] 'Babe, go get your experience, and I will support you.' But sleeping until 10:30 every day is not going to cut it, and it felt like a big load," he explained to People.
"It's not my place as a fiance to financially support somebody. It's been a lack of respect and support on her part."
According to Pavelka, Girardi also became extremely jealous of the post-The Bachelor opportunities that have come his way, which have included participating in Dancing with the Stars' tenth season.
"She was watching these doors fly open for me, and it was causing an intense amount of jealously," he told People.
Pavelka has previously stated he was "saddened" by the split and claimed the two will "remain friends" -- however he told People the romantic aspect of their relationship is finished for the time being.
"In my mind it's over," he said. "I'm never going to say never but I'm not pursuing her, and she's not pursuing me."
By Christopher Rocchio, 06/24/2010
Jake Pavelka has labeled Vienna Girardi's claim that they split because he refused to be intimate with her as "insane."
"That's being dramatic and that's reaching," Pavelka told People in a cover story interview in the magazine's upcoming issue, according to Hollywood Life. "She has me mistaken for somebody else."
The Bachelor: On the Wings of Love couple issued a statement confirming their split on Monday night after Greek actor Gregory Michael said Girardi told him she was single and no longer with Pavelka when they met while attending a children's hospital prom near Los Angeles on Saturday and were subsequently seen kissing at a public beach party event in Santa Monica on Sunday.
It was later reported Pavelka that initiated the split because he felt Girardi was cheating with Michael, however he claims that was not the case.
"That is not what caused the breakup, but it's a factor," he told People. "I'm not going to be in a relationship that I don't fully trust."
While it might not have been the main cause of their split, Pavelka said he feels Girardi was unfaithful -- which she has denied.
"I'm not going to be surprised if more stuff comes out," Pavelka told People about Girardi's alleged infidelity. "I have no idea. I'm just putting my seatbelt on."
Instead, Pavelka claims he split from Girardi -- who has claimed that she was the one to end the relationship, not Pavelka -- because she sold her story to Star magazine, which published a cover story interview with Girardi this week.
"That seriously breaks my trust. I would never do that to her," he told People. "I am beside myself that she would dishonor the relationship like that."
Pavelka presented his final rose and a marriage proposal to Girardi -- and she accepted both during March's The Bachelor: On the Wings of Love finale broadcast, which filmed last fall. The couple subsequently told reporters they "definitely" would wed.
"For the skeptics out there, I followed my heart, and if I had to do it all over again, I would make the same decision over and over," he told People.
"I don't regret what I did."
Girardi's time as one of Pavelka's bachelorettes was a bumpy one -- as she was disliked by most of the season's other women and many viewers while also gaining tabloid attention for allegedly bilking her ex-husband out of thousands of dollars to pay for breast implants while he was deployed in Iraq.
"America couldn't stand that I chose her, and I'd defend her," Pavelka told People.
"For everything to come apart like this, I absolutely feel betrayed. I feel like I don't even know her."
In addition, Pavelka also described Girardi as unmotivated once they were together.
"[I told her] 'Babe, go get your experience, and I will support you.' But sleeping until 10:30 every day is not going to cut it, and it felt like a big load," he explained to People.
"It's not my place as a fiance to financially support somebody. It's been a lack of respect and support on her part."
According to Pavelka, Girardi also became extremely jealous of the post-The Bachelor opportunities that have come his way, which have included participating in Dancing with the Stars' tenth season.
"She was watching these doors fly open for me, and it was causing an intense amount of jealously," he told People.
Pavelka has previously stated he was "saddened" by the split and claimed the two will "remain friends" -- however he told People the romantic aspect of their relationship is finished for the time being.
"In my mind it's over," he said. "I'm never going to say never but I'm not pursuing her, and she's not pursuing me."
Thursday, June 24, 2010
DUELLING ACCOUNTS OF THE JAKE-VIENNA CONFLICT
FROM STAR MAGAZINE:
Star Exclusive: Jake Pavelka Goes Psycho After Split with Vienna Girardi!
June 24, 2010 4:20 PM
Jake Pavelka has said that he and Vienna Girardi will remain friends post-split, but Star has learned that she's currently in hiding after he threatened to attack her!
Jake and Vienna saw each other for the first time since they ended their engagement when they filmed The Bachelor Breakup special for ABC — set to air July 5 — in Los Angeles late last night. And things got real ugly, really fast.
"Vienna was confronting him, exposing all his lies," a source tells Star. "He started screaming at her: 'Shut up! Don't belittle me! Don't question me! Shut up!' And all of a sudden, he literally jumped out of his chair, pulled back his fist and lunged at her! All of the executives were freaking out. They pulled him off of her and rushed them off to separate rooms."
The source continues, "The execs were screaming at him, 'What the heck are you doing?' And the camera people were all like, 'Oh my god, we can't use any of this.'"
Vienna was then shuttled off to an undisclosed location and currently has network representatives with her, making sure she is safe. "Vienna is scared to death," the source says. "She's all alone out there in L.A. and she's upset. She's terrified."
"She's never seen him be that mean," the source adds. "He's been a jerk and belittled her before, like 'You don't know what you're talking about.' And she's put up with it for the last four months, because she did everything she could to make the relationship work. But now she obviously knows she made the right decision. Who knows how ABC will try to splice and dice this and turn it around for their golden boy, making Vienna look bad like they always do. But people have to know what he did!"
Pick up the July 5 issue of Star today for our six-page interview with Vienna. In it she details how Jake stopped being intimate with her just a month into their relationship, how he was emotionally abusive and much more!
AND FROM US WEEKLY:
Exclusive: Vienna Storms Off in Tears During Jake Reunion Special
Thursday – June 24, 2010 – 5:12pm
Things got very heated between Jake Pavelka and ex-fiancee Vienna Girardi when they reunited for the first time since announcing their split at a two-hour ABC taping Thursday.
The two arrived separately at an undisclosed location to film the segment, set to air during The Bachelorette July 5, to discuss their highly publicized split.
Though Internet reports claim Pavelka, 32, raised a fist at Girardi, 24, an insider tells UsMagazine.com: "It did not happen. He was calm and collected."
At one point -- after Girardi kept continually cutting him off -- Pavelka stood up. But the insider says he simply asked, "Will you just let me finish?"
"He couldn't get a word out -- it was very reflective of their relationship," says the source, who adds that host Chris Harrison often had to tell Girardi, "Vienna, let him talk."
"Vienna was on the defense," the source tells Us. "She was trying to play victim."
She ended up storming off the set in tears.
"Jake has lost all respect for her," the source tells Us. "She crossed the line when she sold their relationship to Star."
The blow-up Thursday only reaffirmed that they made the right decision to call it quits, says the insider.
Adds the source, "They couldn’t even have an adult conversation while a mediator was there with them."
*****************************
Where does the truth lie?
Star Exclusive: Jake Pavelka Goes Psycho After Split with Vienna Girardi!
June 24, 2010 4:20 PM
Jake Pavelka has said that he and Vienna Girardi will remain friends post-split, but Star has learned that she's currently in hiding after he threatened to attack her!
Jake and Vienna saw each other for the first time since they ended their engagement when they filmed The Bachelor Breakup special for ABC — set to air July 5 — in Los Angeles late last night. And things got real ugly, really fast.
"Vienna was confronting him, exposing all his lies," a source tells Star. "He started screaming at her: 'Shut up! Don't belittle me! Don't question me! Shut up!' And all of a sudden, he literally jumped out of his chair, pulled back his fist and lunged at her! All of the executives were freaking out. They pulled him off of her and rushed them off to separate rooms."
The source continues, "The execs were screaming at him, 'What the heck are you doing?' And the camera people were all like, 'Oh my god, we can't use any of this.'"
Vienna was then shuttled off to an undisclosed location and currently has network representatives with her, making sure she is safe. "Vienna is scared to death," the source says. "She's all alone out there in L.A. and she's upset. She's terrified."
"She's never seen him be that mean," the source adds. "He's been a jerk and belittled her before, like 'You don't know what you're talking about.' And she's put up with it for the last four months, because she did everything she could to make the relationship work. But now she obviously knows she made the right decision. Who knows how ABC will try to splice and dice this and turn it around for their golden boy, making Vienna look bad like they always do. But people have to know what he did!"
Pick up the July 5 issue of Star today for our six-page interview with Vienna. In it she details how Jake stopped being intimate with her just a month into their relationship, how he was emotionally abusive and much more!
AND FROM US WEEKLY:
Exclusive: Vienna Storms Off in Tears During Jake Reunion Special
Thursday – June 24, 2010 – 5:12pm
Things got very heated between Jake Pavelka and ex-fiancee Vienna Girardi when they reunited for the first time since announcing their split at a two-hour ABC taping Thursday.
The two arrived separately at an undisclosed location to film the segment, set to air during The Bachelorette July 5, to discuss their highly publicized split.
Though Internet reports claim Pavelka, 32, raised a fist at Girardi, 24, an insider tells UsMagazine.com: "It did not happen. He was calm and collected."
At one point -- after Girardi kept continually cutting him off -- Pavelka stood up. But the insider says he simply asked, "Will you just let me finish?"
"He couldn't get a word out -- it was very reflective of their relationship," says the source, who adds that host Chris Harrison often had to tell Girardi, "Vienna, let him talk."
"Vienna was on the defense," the source tells Us. "She was trying to play victim."
She ended up storming off the set in tears.
"Jake has lost all respect for her," the source tells Us. "She crossed the line when she sold their relationship to Star."
The blow-up Thursday only reaffirmed that they made the right decision to call it quits, says the insider.
Adds the source, "They couldn’t even have an adult conversation while a mediator was there with them."
*****************************
Where does the truth lie?
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
MARIANNA'S MUSINGS: ALI'S EPISODE 5
AND NOW... THE MOST DRAMATIC MENU EVER
ICED TEAS AND MOLTEN LAVA CAKE
We're in the frozen land and a giggly Ali is in fine, flirty form. Her bundled-up bevy of bachelors are bracing for the ice of the land and the fire of Ali.
(And if she can't quite manage it on her own, there's some hot lava, erupting conveniently nearby).
CHILI CON QUESO
It's very cold out and the bachelors have one hour to make up the cheesiest poems they can about Ali. It is a resounding success.
TOAD IN THE HOLE
Six guys spelunking in a dark cave. What could be more romantic. But which frogs will turn into princes?
TWO PEAS IN A POD
Kirk and Ali don matching sweaters (which Kirk apparently never takes off again), blissfully ignorant of the smirks from locals in downtown Reykjavik.
Later, Ali finds out Kirk's big secret. That he scrapbooks? That he likes patterned sweaters?
No, apparently, he has never been with a woman for longer than a year because once, he got really sick and almost died.
Can you say non sequitur? Failing that, can you say fickle females? Did they all abandon him to cope with his illness asbestos he could on his own?
BANGERS AND MASH
Justin approaches the 2 on 1 date as Rated-R, vowing to knock Kasey right out of the ring.
After being hit on the head with one too many wrestling analogies, viewers everywhere wrestle with this question: Which is more fake, The Bachelorette or a wrestling match?
MIXED NUTS
Getting nuttier by the moment, Kasey rambles and repeats to the camera, to all the bachelors and even to some befuddled Icelanders in shops and in the street that he is Kasey Kahl and he is who he is.
Kasey really knows how to drive a point home. Here are some 'Kasey-isms', quoted verbatim, on this week's episode:
"I love to give; I love to share."
"I am genuine and I am sincere."
"The tattoo stands for my feelings, my emotions."
"I'm going to be myself and be who I am."
" I'm here to guard and protect Ali's heart."
Oh, and one more question. Was Kasey speaking Icelandic or Unicorn when they subtitled him?
GLACIER PUNCH
So Justin gets his cast off but it's Kasey who gets cast off.
An abandoned Kasey is left looking lost and lonely atop a glacier. Don't feel too sorry for him, though; we managed to get a glimpse of the second helicopter, dispatched to collect the doleful guardian of women's hearts everywhere.
SEARED FRANKFURTER
Frank remains a hot (and bothered) dog. Not only is he boiling about having to share Ali on a group date but he keeps furtively spying on her with other guys.
On the plus side, though, he does seem to be Kasey's only friend and confidant. The hug he gives Kasey just before the 2 on 1 date speaks volumes: After all, Frank has seen the tattoo and knows Kasey is going home that night.
Ali does seem very interested in Frank. She chides him for not giving his full effort. But he finally rewards her with "the look I was missing, the look that tells me you want me".
ALPHABET SOUP
Ali forgets her schooling again, as she says "supposably" instead of 'supposedly". Frankly, I am "shooken up" at this poor use of language coming from someone who graduated college with honours.
HOT FUDGE
Roberto fudges the "hot" question with slightly messy results.
Ali wonders aloud if he's too hot for her. Instead of telling her how beautiful SHE is, he feigns humility and manages to insult Ali in a roundabout way by saying "I don't think I'm that hot."
SAN FRANCISCO SOURDOUGH
Chris L. declares that he would gladly make his living dealing with the sour smell of garbage in San Francisco if Ali were to choose him. Ali find this sweet but the spark for her seems to be souring. Could their romance be toast?
NACHO MAN
While the boys are horsing around during the group date, a manly Ty gallops ahead and gains considerable ground in the race for Ali's heart.
An expert equestrian, Ty helps hapless horseman Chris L. This does not escape Ali's attention and admiration and she later rewards Ty, in the Hot Spring of Ardor (TM).
PICKLED PORK
Ali is feeling no pain as she strips down to her bikini and jumps into the steamy lake, giggling and raising the men's...hopes.
HALF MOON PIE
The men put their modesty behind them and strip down at The Blue Lagoon. The moon briefly goes behind a black censorship square.
BEEF STEW
Ali stews about whether she will be loved back. Chris Harrison has a beef with her lack of confidence and counsels her to take a chance on love.
CAT'S TONGUE COOKIES
Poor Chris N. There's no chemistry; he's literally at a loss for words and he doesn't even merit lunch twice a year.
THAT'S A WRAP
On the menu next week: Turkey
ICED TEAS AND MOLTEN LAVA CAKE
We're in the frozen land and a giggly Ali is in fine, flirty form. Her bundled-up bevy of bachelors are bracing for the ice of the land and the fire of Ali.
(And if she can't quite manage it on her own, there's some hot lava, erupting conveniently nearby).
CHILI CON QUESO
It's very cold out and the bachelors have one hour to make up the cheesiest poems they can about Ali. It is a resounding success.
TOAD IN THE HOLE
Six guys spelunking in a dark cave. What could be more romantic. But which frogs will turn into princes?
TWO PEAS IN A POD
Kirk and Ali don matching sweaters (which Kirk apparently never takes off again), blissfully ignorant of the smirks from locals in downtown Reykjavik.
Later, Ali finds out Kirk's big secret. That he scrapbooks? That he likes patterned sweaters?
No, apparently, he has never been with a woman for longer than a year because once, he got really sick and almost died.
Can you say non sequitur? Failing that, can you say fickle females? Did they all abandon him to cope with his illness asbestos he could on his own?
BANGERS AND MASH
Justin approaches the 2 on 1 date as Rated-R, vowing to knock Kasey right out of the ring.
After being hit on the head with one too many wrestling analogies, viewers everywhere wrestle with this question: Which is more fake, The Bachelorette or a wrestling match?
MIXED NUTS
Getting nuttier by the moment, Kasey rambles and repeats to the camera, to all the bachelors and even to some befuddled Icelanders in shops and in the street that he is Kasey Kahl and he is who he is.
Kasey really knows how to drive a point home. Here are some 'Kasey-isms', quoted verbatim, on this week's episode:
"I love to give; I love to share."
"I am genuine and I am sincere."
"The tattoo stands for my feelings, my emotions."
"I'm going to be myself and be who I am."
" I'm here to guard and protect Ali's heart."
Oh, and one more question. Was Kasey speaking Icelandic or Unicorn when they subtitled him?
GLACIER PUNCH
So Justin gets his cast off but it's Kasey who gets cast off.
An abandoned Kasey is left looking lost and lonely atop a glacier. Don't feel too sorry for him, though; we managed to get a glimpse of the second helicopter, dispatched to collect the doleful guardian of women's hearts everywhere.
SEARED FRANKFURTER
Frank remains a hot (and bothered) dog. Not only is he boiling about having to share Ali on a group date but he keeps furtively spying on her with other guys.
On the plus side, though, he does seem to be Kasey's only friend and confidant. The hug he gives Kasey just before the 2 on 1 date speaks volumes: After all, Frank has seen the tattoo and knows Kasey is going home that night.
Ali does seem very interested in Frank. She chides him for not giving his full effort. But he finally rewards her with "the look I was missing, the look that tells me you want me".
ALPHABET SOUP
Ali forgets her schooling again, as she says "supposably" instead of 'supposedly". Frankly, I am "shooken up" at this poor use of language coming from someone who graduated college with honours.
HOT FUDGE
Roberto fudges the "hot" question with slightly messy results.
Ali wonders aloud if he's too hot for her. Instead of telling her how beautiful SHE is, he feigns humility and manages to insult Ali in a roundabout way by saying "I don't think I'm that hot."
SAN FRANCISCO SOURDOUGH
Chris L. declares that he would gladly make his living dealing with the sour smell of garbage in San Francisco if Ali were to choose him. Ali find this sweet but the spark for her seems to be souring. Could their romance be toast?
NACHO MAN
While the boys are horsing around during the group date, a manly Ty gallops ahead and gains considerable ground in the race for Ali's heart.
An expert equestrian, Ty helps hapless horseman Chris L. This does not escape Ali's attention and admiration and she later rewards Ty, in the Hot Spring of Ardor (TM).
PICKLED PORK
Ali is feeling no pain as she strips down to her bikini and jumps into the steamy lake, giggling and raising the men's...hopes.
HALF MOON PIE
The men put their modesty behind them and strip down at The Blue Lagoon. The moon briefly goes behind a black censorship square.
BEEF STEW
Ali stews about whether she will be loved back. Chris Harrison has a beef with her lack of confidence and counsels her to take a chance on love.
CAT'S TONGUE COOKIES
Poor Chris N. There's no chemistry; he's literally at a loss for words and he doesn't even merit lunch twice a year.
THAT'S A WRAP
On the menu next week: Turkey
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Jesse from Jake's season
Just FYI
I don't watch Entertainment Tonight Canada very often but had to check in tonight to hear about Jake/Vienna fallout. Jesse S (can't remember her surname) was a "guest announcer"
Guess I was just surprised, thought she had disappeared into the woodwork.
Just more proof that the only reason these people go on this show is for exposure, and certainly not romance.
I don't watch Entertainment Tonight Canada very often but had to check in tonight to hear about Jake/Vienna fallout. Jesse S (can't remember her surname) was a "guest announcer"
Guess I was just surprised, thought she had disappeared into the woodwork.
Just more proof that the only reason these people go on this show is for exposure, and certainly not romance.
Jillian's Revealing Comments
About the Jake/Vienna break up, Jillian tells the media:
“People think that [they] are just reality stars, relationships come and go, or they did it for publicity.
But the truth is someone is hurting here… Maybe [it's] both of them, and that saddens me. Even if everyone thought they ‘weren’t meant to be,’ they wanted to be, or wanted to prove they could be. And it is always heartbreaking when your goals or dreams don’t quite amount up to what you wanted them to be.
I send big hugs to both of them and hope their hearts heal quickly, and people are easy on them. Again, to remind people who are quick to judge — they are just regular people, who really believed in love.”
Sounds like she could be talking about herself and Ed, who are going through a "rough patch" at the moment, apparently exacerbated by alcohol.
Jillian has said she wants to take a break from talking to the world through twitter and facebook but she did tell the media that she and Ed have stopped drinking.
Her priority at the moment? A “healthy lifestyle and focusing on things that make [her] happy.”
“People think that [they] are just reality stars, relationships come and go, or they did it for publicity.
But the truth is someone is hurting here… Maybe [it's] both of them, and that saddens me. Even if everyone thought they ‘weren’t meant to be,’ they wanted to be, or wanted to prove they could be. And it is always heartbreaking when your goals or dreams don’t quite amount up to what you wanted them to be.
I send big hugs to both of them and hope their hearts heal quickly, and people are easy on them. Again, to remind people who are quick to judge — they are just regular people, who really believed in love.”
Sounds like she could be talking about herself and Ed, who are going through a "rough patch" at the moment, apparently exacerbated by alcohol.
Jillian has said she wants to take a break from talking to the world through twitter and facebook but she did tell the media that she and Ed have stopped drinking.
Her priority at the moment? A “healthy lifestyle and focusing on things that make [her] happy.”
Monday, June 21, 2010
JAKE AND VIENNA HAVE BROKEN UP
Jake Pavelka & Vienna Girardi: It’s Over!
June 21st, 2010
Author: Mary Beth Quirk
It seems the fairy tale romance that began for Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi on The Bachelor has come to an end.
A rep for the couple confirms to OK! exclusively that “Jake and Vienna have split and appreciate respect for their privacy at this time.”
The shocking news first came out on Saturday at the Children’s Hospital of Orange County Oncology Prom near L.A., where Vienna confessed to Greek actor Gregory Michael that her engagement was over.
“We hit it off and hung out and danced the night away, ” Gregory explains to OK!, adding, “She made it very clear that it was over with Jake.”
A close source to Jake and Vienna — who got engaged in March after he picked her as the winner of ABC’s reality dating contest — also confirmed the break-up.
A rep for ABC had not responded to our request for comment by the time this story was published.
June 21st, 2010
Author: Mary Beth Quirk
It seems the fairy tale romance that began for Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi on The Bachelor has come to an end.
A rep for the couple confirms to OK! exclusively that “Jake and Vienna have split and appreciate respect for their privacy at this time.”
The shocking news first came out on Saturday at the Children’s Hospital of Orange County Oncology Prom near L.A., where Vienna confessed to Greek actor Gregory Michael that her engagement was over.
“We hit it off and hung out and danced the night away, ” Gregory explains to OK!, adding, “She made it very clear that it was over with Jake.”
A close source to Jake and Vienna — who got engaged in March after he picked her as the winner of ABC’s reality dating contest — also confirmed the break-up.
A rep for ABC had not responded to our request for comment by the time this story was published.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
HOT PHOTOS OF BACHELOR PAD CONTESTANTS
There's something here for everyone.
Koala, Jesse is looking fine in his photo.
Jim, Gia's picture is surely going to please you.
Wes seems to have bulked up for the occasion.
Tenley seems to have shed her Disney image, trying to look sultry, with longer hair (extensions? I can't tell the difference between badly dyed stringy hair and extensions anymore).
Craig is looking menacing and as 'dangerous' as ever, ready to lay into the Weatherman.
The Weatherman (sorry, Jonathan) is, characteristically covering his nether regions under water (either fearing 'shrinkage' or perhaps, protecting himself from violence from Craig?)
Elizabeth (the tease from Jake's season) has hair that's turned quite gold from the restraint of not letting men kiss her until she's good and ready, lol.
Natalie, the stuffed-bear loving girl from Jason's season, (who has been to every Jesse Cscinsak bach party and cruise) is looking as hopeful as ever that she'll finally get her time in the sun. Judging by what I've seen of her in the past, my best advice to her would be to stay out of the sun -- literally.
David Good is looking buff and manly, with the Man Code conveniently tattooed, for easy reference, on one bicep.
There is a surfeit of Jessies: Sulidis from Jake's season, Kovaks from Jillian's season and Beck, freshly rejected from Ali's season. Sadly, no sign of the one Jesse who has worked tirelessly to keep his name and his Bachelor association in the news: DeAnna's Jesse Csincsak.
Juan Barbieri is there, looking nervously over his shoulder to see if Dave Good is coming at him to thrust above-mentioned tattooed bicep in his face.
Nikki Kaapke from Jason's season is there -- also a fixture at the Csincsak parties -- to remind all the implanted woman what real boobs look like.
Michelle from Jason's season is there, hoping to clear her 'crazy' name (which is probably not what Fleiss had in mind when he casted her).
And, surprisingly, Kiptyn is there. Okay, maybe not that surprisingly, as he has participated in many post-show outings. Maybe he's just there to support his bach family. Or maybe he's there because there have been rumours about him and Tenley recently.
Here's the link. Sorry you can't just click on it (Can someone give me easy instructions on how to do that, for future links?) but you can copy and paste:
http://www.people.com/people/package/gallery/0,,20055177_20394313,00.html
Koala, Jesse is looking fine in his photo.
Jim, Gia's picture is surely going to please you.
Wes seems to have bulked up for the occasion.
Tenley seems to have shed her Disney image, trying to look sultry, with longer hair (extensions? I can't tell the difference between badly dyed stringy hair and extensions anymore).
Craig is looking menacing and as 'dangerous' as ever, ready to lay into the Weatherman.
The Weatherman (sorry, Jonathan) is, characteristically covering his nether regions under water (either fearing 'shrinkage' or perhaps, protecting himself from violence from Craig?)
Elizabeth (the tease from Jake's season) has hair that's turned quite gold from the restraint of not letting men kiss her until she's good and ready, lol.
Natalie, the stuffed-bear loving girl from Jason's season, (who has been to every Jesse Cscinsak bach party and cruise) is looking as hopeful as ever that she'll finally get her time in the sun. Judging by what I've seen of her in the past, my best advice to her would be to stay out of the sun -- literally.
David Good is looking buff and manly, with the Man Code conveniently tattooed, for easy reference, on one bicep.
There is a surfeit of Jessies: Sulidis from Jake's season, Kovaks from Jillian's season and Beck, freshly rejected from Ali's season. Sadly, no sign of the one Jesse who has worked tirelessly to keep his name and his Bachelor association in the news: DeAnna's Jesse Csincsak.
Juan Barbieri is there, looking nervously over his shoulder to see if Dave Good is coming at him to thrust above-mentioned tattooed bicep in his face.
Nikki Kaapke from Jason's season is there -- also a fixture at the Csincsak parties -- to remind all the implanted woman what real boobs look like.
Michelle from Jason's season is there, hoping to clear her 'crazy' name (which is probably not what Fleiss had in mind when he casted her).
And, surprisingly, Kiptyn is there. Okay, maybe not that surprisingly, as he has participated in many post-show outings. Maybe he's just there to support his bach family. Or maybe he's there because there have been rumours about him and Tenley recently.
Here's the link. Sorry you can't just click on it (Can someone give me easy instructions on how to do that, for future links?) but you can copy and paste:
http://www.people.com/people/package/gallery/0,,20055177_20394313,00.html
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Unicorn Love – A Fantasy Reality Show
(as if there were any other kind)
Inspired by Chris L and Decogirl
The princess-to-be CinderAli stands before a fairytale castle, wringing her hands. A point of light appears above her, growing larger as it descends. It resolves into an elderly fairy.
Fairy God Mother: My dear are you ready to meet your suitors and find true love?
CinderAli: How can I be ready when I’m dressed in rags?
The fairy waves her wand and CinderAli is dressed in a beautiful blue gown. Bluebirds hover above her and tie a blue ribbon in her hair.
CinderAli: This is wonderful! Do you have it in yellow?
The fairy rolls her eyes but obliges her. With another wave of her wand, the dress turns yellow. The bluebirds remove the ribbon. Two canaries replace it with a yellow ribbon.
Fairy God Mother: Hark! Your suitors approach! I best be gone.
The fairy disappears in a ball of light. A dragon carrying a variety of different fantasy creatures lands beside the princess. A small man in a pointed hat and dark robes approaches her. He reaches behind his back and produces a thistle on a long stem.
Prognosticator: Drats! That was supposed to be a rose!
CinderAli: Are you a sorcerer?
Prognosticator: I haven’t got my license yet. I’m a prognosticator.
CinderAli: So you’re a sorcerer’s apprentice?
Prognosticator: I HATE when people call me that!
He starts to cry.
CinderAli: Sorry!
A large ogre carrying a giant club roughly pushes the prognosticator aside.
Prognosticator: Hey! I’d turn you into a frog if I passed Transmutation!
Ogre: You must be CinderAli.
CinderAli: You must be an ogre.
Ogre: You got a problem with that?
An elf appears riding a unicorn.
Elf: Excuse me ogre. Can I steal the princess away?
Ogre: Suit ye’self.
Elf: Why is it you guys all have Scottish accents anyway?
The ogre shakes his head and lumbers off.
Elf: Princess CinderAli, will you ride away with me?
He reaches down and lifts her atop the unicorn in front of him.
CinderAli: Oh my!
A cat in boots and a swashbuckling hat strides up. He speaks in a sexy Spanish accent.
Puss-in-Boots: Elf, I fear that you get ahead of yourself.
The cat draws his sword and cuts the saddle strap on the unicorn. The elf and the princess fall. The cat adroitly catches the princess. He sets her on her feet. She stands and addresses the crowd that has gathered around her.
CinderAli: We’re going to have a wonderful time here! On our group date, I’ll be kidnapped by an evil magician and you will all have to save me. Next, I will be put under a sleep spell and the one whose kiss awakens me will get extra points. Finally, the suitor who can retrieve the Rose of Continuation from the fabled Hot Spring of Ardor will win my heart.
Inspired by Chris L and Decogirl
The princess-to-be CinderAli stands before a fairytale castle, wringing her hands. A point of light appears above her, growing larger as it descends. It resolves into an elderly fairy.
Fairy God Mother: My dear are you ready to meet your suitors and find true love?
CinderAli: How can I be ready when I’m dressed in rags?
The fairy waves her wand and CinderAli is dressed in a beautiful blue gown. Bluebirds hover above her and tie a blue ribbon in her hair.
CinderAli: This is wonderful! Do you have it in yellow?
The fairy rolls her eyes but obliges her. With another wave of her wand, the dress turns yellow. The bluebirds remove the ribbon. Two canaries replace it with a yellow ribbon.
Fairy God Mother: Hark! Your suitors approach! I best be gone.
The fairy disappears in a ball of light. A dragon carrying a variety of different fantasy creatures lands beside the princess. A small man in a pointed hat and dark robes approaches her. He reaches behind his back and produces a thistle on a long stem.
Prognosticator: Drats! That was supposed to be a rose!
CinderAli: Are you a sorcerer?
Prognosticator: I haven’t got my license yet. I’m a prognosticator.
CinderAli: So you’re a sorcerer’s apprentice?
Prognosticator: I HATE when people call me that!
He starts to cry.
CinderAli: Sorry!
A large ogre carrying a giant club roughly pushes the prognosticator aside.
Prognosticator: Hey! I’d turn you into a frog if I passed Transmutation!
Ogre: You must be CinderAli.
CinderAli: You must be an ogre.
Ogre: You got a problem with that?
An elf appears riding a unicorn.
Elf: Excuse me ogre. Can I steal the princess away?
Ogre: Suit ye’self.
Elf: Why is it you guys all have Scottish accents anyway?
The ogre shakes his head and lumbers off.
Elf: Princess CinderAli, will you ride away with me?
He reaches down and lifts her atop the unicorn in front of him.
CinderAli: Oh my!
A cat in boots and a swashbuckling hat strides up. He speaks in a sexy Spanish accent.
Puss-in-Boots: Elf, I fear that you get ahead of yourself.
The cat draws his sword and cuts the saddle strap on the unicorn. The elf and the princess fall. The cat adroitly catches the princess. He sets her on her feet. She stands and addresses the crowd that has gathered around her.
CinderAli: We’re going to have a wonderful time here! On our group date, I’ll be kidnapped by an evil magician and you will all have to save me. Next, I will be put under a sleep spell and the one whose kiss awakens me will get extra points. Finally, the suitor who can retrieve the Rose of Continuation from the fabled Hot Spring of Ardor will win my heart.
Gia's commentary on Episode 4
I finally watched the episode online and discovered that they have one with commentary by Gia. They show messages in a side window that are timed to appear with the referenced events. I would have preferred a separate video showing her make the comments (preferably larger than the show window), but one can’t have everything. The website claims that this comment process will be opened up to everyone. I would guess that some of us will not be invited to participate.
Gia’s comments are not deep or even especially personal (she doesn’t say anything unkind about anyone, even Kasey). But it was Gia! For example, recall that Kasey attempted to wax poetic (Belle, could you give him some lessons, please?) about how Ali left her cocoon and became a butterfly. Gia’s entry was: “Aaaaaaaw Kasey, you are so sweet but that kind of talk hasn't worked with the ladies since the 1800's”.
I thought the funniest thing she said was about the Lion King duet. First she commented about his ample musculature and how cute he looked in the loincloth. When the rest of the guys expressed their jealousy, she wrote: “Oh stop, you're not jealous that Roberto is spending all of his time with Ali -- you're jealous because you want to wear his little costume.”
During the post-lobster birthday call to his father, Gia became smitten. Her comment: “Chris just jumped to the top of my list. A great guy with a great family.” I noted in a post in the first episode that Chris L seemed suitable to Gia. It seems there may be something to that. If Ali (or Fleiss) doesn’t snatch him up, perhaps Gia will.
Mara, where are you? You’re missing Gia-talk!
Gia’s comments are not deep or even especially personal (she doesn’t say anything unkind about anyone, even Kasey). But it was Gia! For example, recall that Kasey attempted to wax poetic (Belle, could you give him some lessons, please?) about how Ali left her cocoon and became a butterfly. Gia’s entry was: “Aaaaaaaw Kasey, you are so sweet but that kind of talk hasn't worked with the ladies since the 1800's”.
I thought the funniest thing she said was about the Lion King duet. First she commented about his ample musculature and how cute he looked in the loincloth. When the rest of the guys expressed their jealousy, she wrote: “Oh stop, you're not jealous that Roberto is spending all of his time with Ali -- you're jealous because you want to wear his little costume.”
During the post-lobster birthday call to his father, Gia became smitten. Her comment: “Chris just jumped to the top of my list. A great guy with a great family.” I noted in a post in the first episode that Chris L seemed suitable to Gia. It seems there may be something to that. If Ali (or Fleiss) doesn’t snatch him up, perhaps Gia will.
Mara, where are you? You’re missing Gia-talk!
Friday, June 18, 2010
Marianna's Musings: Calling all bachboard peeps!
Yes, this is the right place to find Marianna's Musings. Welcome. Hope you'll stay a while and post your thoughts.
Marianna's Musings Thread: Calling Ocean, Chi, Ironcat, Dreamy, Jul, Ugh, whose, cherrries, kybach, barbu, and so many more!
Hope you googled to find this. Looking forward to you all (and others whom I've temporarily forgotten to mention) will come and post here.
Here we can't be muzzled by the BB mods.
Marianna
Here we can't be muzzled by the BB mods.
Marianna
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Marianna's Musings: Ali's Episode 4
SIX IN THE CITY
Six bachelors go to New York City to watch Roberto hoist Ali up on a high wire and wrap himself around her.
THE LOIN KING
In an unabashed attempt at getting more female (and no doubt some male -- it IS a Broadway show, after all) viewers swooning, the producers have Roberto clad in a fancy loincloth and not much else.
Can you feel his love tonight?
SOMEWHERE, OVER THE RAINBOW
Ali gets acquainted with Chris L.'s parents. Thanks to rainbows and AT&T, he is never too far from mom and dad. Ali hears about wonderful mom and speaks to dad. She is is utterly charmed and touched by the whole family and Chris's chance at F1 just gets better and better.
A NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM
There Fleiss goes, blatantly ripping off movie scenes again.
Kasey and Ali have a one-on-one date at the American Museum of Natural History. Kasey is so cringingly cheesy that he is one American who will soon naturally be history.
LOVE SICK
Ali must have a propensity to lose her voice when she gets sick. Remember her hoarse whisper as she presented Jake with a peacock feather at the Meet & Greet?
Despite Ali's contagious condition, Frank, Kirk and Chris L. are eager to kiss her, hug her, lie in bed with her and bring her soup. Caution is thrown to the wind and there is much exchanging of germy saliva.
A new virus, the F1N1, (also known as the 'swoon flu') is propagated.
UNICORN LOVE
Chris L. tells Ali the story of a land where Cupid rides a unicorn through fields of flowers, brandishing a sword and a rose and stone-encrusted shield. If we listen carefully, we can hear the chirping of Tenley Molzahn and the bluebirds of happiness. Cute Disney mice freely roam Bachelor mansions and scamper through the fields with the unicorns.
It's a beautiful place. Kasey lives here.
CAPTAIN KIRK
Kirk boldly goes where no man has gone before (this early in the game, anyway). This will now be the second time he and Ali are in or near a bed together.
Last week, he maximized his rolling-around-in-bed time with Ali, even after the director yelled cut. This week, he adroitly escorts an ill Ali to her suite and manages to tuck her into bed (but not before lots of cuddling and caressing).
KRAZY KASEY?
Either Mike Fleiss has outdone himself with editing and provoking the contestants or we really need someone to guard and protect Kasey from himself.
From his bizarre and untimely bouts of singing to his wrist tattoo representing Ali and the eleven remaining men (because she's his true love and the men are his blood brothers for life), Kasey wins the prize for most Krazy Kontestant ever.
GOING TO THE DOGS
Country boy Jesse is rejected by city girl Ali. She chooses Kasey over him and he bounds home happily to his dogs.
ALI MAY BE UNDER THE WEATHER BUT SHE'S OVER THE WEATHERMAN
There is a distinct chill in the air as Ali says goodbye to the weatherman. A possible storm was brewing as Jonathan's face clouded over and there appeared to be a slight chance of precipitation. However, he put up strong front and left, dry-eyed.
The skies are sunny again as the remaining bachelors discover they are next going to Iceland.
Six bachelors go to New York City to watch Roberto hoist Ali up on a high wire and wrap himself around her.
THE LOIN KING
In an unabashed attempt at getting more female (and no doubt some male -- it IS a Broadway show, after all) viewers swooning, the producers have Roberto clad in a fancy loincloth and not much else.
Can you feel his love tonight?
SOMEWHERE, OVER THE RAINBOW
Ali gets acquainted with Chris L.'s parents. Thanks to rainbows and AT&T, he is never too far from mom and dad. Ali hears about wonderful mom and speaks to dad. She is is utterly charmed and touched by the whole family and Chris's chance at F1 just gets better and better.
A NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM
There Fleiss goes, blatantly ripping off movie scenes again.
Kasey and Ali have a one-on-one date at the American Museum of Natural History. Kasey is so cringingly cheesy that he is one American who will soon naturally be history.
LOVE SICK
Ali must have a propensity to lose her voice when she gets sick. Remember her hoarse whisper as she presented Jake with a peacock feather at the Meet & Greet?
Despite Ali's contagious condition, Frank, Kirk and Chris L. are eager to kiss her, hug her, lie in bed with her and bring her soup. Caution is thrown to the wind and there is much exchanging of germy saliva.
A new virus, the F1N1, (also known as the 'swoon flu') is propagated.
UNICORN LOVE
Chris L. tells Ali the story of a land where Cupid rides a unicorn through fields of flowers, brandishing a sword and a rose and stone-encrusted shield. If we listen carefully, we can hear the chirping of Tenley Molzahn and the bluebirds of happiness. Cute Disney mice freely roam Bachelor mansions and scamper through the fields with the unicorns.
It's a beautiful place. Kasey lives here.
CAPTAIN KIRK
Kirk boldly goes where no man has gone before (this early in the game, anyway). This will now be the second time he and Ali are in or near a bed together.
Last week, he maximized his rolling-around-in-bed time with Ali, even after the director yelled cut. This week, he adroitly escorts an ill Ali to her suite and manages to tuck her into bed (but not before lots of cuddling and caressing).
KRAZY KASEY?
Either Mike Fleiss has outdone himself with editing and provoking the contestants or we really need someone to guard and protect Kasey from himself.
From his bizarre and untimely bouts of singing to his wrist tattoo representing Ali and the eleven remaining men (because she's his true love and the men are his blood brothers for life), Kasey wins the prize for most Krazy Kontestant ever.
GOING TO THE DOGS
Country boy Jesse is rejected by city girl Ali. She chooses Kasey over him and he bounds home happily to his dogs.
ALI MAY BE UNDER THE WEATHER BUT SHE'S OVER THE WEATHERMAN
There is a distinct chill in the air as Ali says goodbye to the weatherman. A possible storm was brewing as Jonathan's face clouded over and there appeared to be a slight chance of precipitation. However, he put up strong front and left, dry-eyed.
The skies are sunny again as the remaining bachelors discover they are next going to Iceland.
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Have we come to a JED-end in the road?
On June 09, US Weekly said this about Jill and Ed going through a "rough patch":
"Like any other couple, our life is not perfect," Bachelorette star Jillian Harris tells US about her life with Ed Swiderski, 30. "We still love each other but there have been tiny bumps in the road". (One source of tension: "I like to be a hermit and Ed likes to go out with his friends."
Still, the designer, 30, who lives with her fiance of one year in Chicago says she's proud of how they've worked through their issues by communicating and giving each other space when needed.
And while their planned move to San Francisco is on hold, a wedding is not.
"I don't know when we're going to get married," she says. "But we're still moving forward."
*******
On June 8, the day before the US Weekly article appeared, Ed said this is on his website:
The Break-up
We were contacted last week by some tabloids, then a few messages tipping off some hot news coming in. This happens from time to time, though we have been doing a lot of press lately due to the new season, so it's expected.
Allegedly, Jill and I broke up and I have been seen "partying" and "around other girls." This is completely absurd. I mean, how in the world is this possible that I am seen out late...and I'm in the presence of women? The nerve of these people...just can't believe it!
Wait. Well maybe I can believe it. Last I checked I do not live in a monastery, and I'm definitely a bit of a frat boy at heart. Let's face it, I have fourteen of my college buddies living within two square miles of me. And I went to Michigan State, so these guys don't mess around. Not to mention Chicago is one of the world's largest adult playgrounds (and the most bars per capita in the US -very proud of this one). Don't get me wrong, I'm not out dating strippers and wearing Ed Hardy shirts either.
That said, Jill and I have had a few bumps here and there. Believe it or not, we actually have disagreed a few times too (I know, shocking!). And we are working through these things together. It's definitely not always easy, but we always stay positive.
There will always be rumors I'm sure. And there isn't a whole lot we can do about that. So keep 'em coming so I can restart my 15 minute clock over to the right! :)
******
And here's what Jillian tweeted the day before the article came out:
Good Morning Tabloids! Save your airmiles & your time, your working on a dry story ... @eswiderski & I are still going strong!
5:06 AM Jun 9th via web
And the day the article came out:
Had to laugh...Just read US weekly. It's not so much that I am a hermit... I'm just over so the bar scene. Especially city bars. Bleh
12:39 PM Jun 9th via Twitterrific
and
I do miss him, speculation does not drive actions, can't worry bout what others think, i'd go crazy! Lol thnk u 4 ur concern tho
However, she also tweeted cryptic messages such as these:
Exactly what the doctor ordered
1,276,463,577,000.00 via Twitterrific
and
Thank you, to all of you who have warmed my heart today... You know who you are.
1,276,555,571,000.00 via Twitterrific
and
thank you Gina... I needed to hear that today. Thanks for the reminder to keep it up. Xox
1,276,269,545,000.00 via Twitterrific
Also, she tweeted a link to her most recent interview, where she conspicuously refrains from mentioning Ed or her upcoming wedding at all (once the subject of oh so many tweets).
Check it out:
http://ow.ly/1YSL4
Finally, she appeared on Breakfast Television in Vancouver a day or so ago, waving her hand around, showing that she is not wearing her engagement ring.
What does all this mean? Is JED dead or alive?
"Like any other couple, our life is not perfect," Bachelorette star Jillian Harris tells US about her life with Ed Swiderski, 30. "We still love each other but there have been tiny bumps in the road". (One source of tension: "I like to be a hermit and Ed likes to go out with his friends."
Still, the designer, 30, who lives with her fiance of one year in Chicago says she's proud of how they've worked through their issues by communicating and giving each other space when needed.
And while their planned move to San Francisco is on hold, a wedding is not.
"I don't know when we're going to get married," she says. "But we're still moving forward."
*******
On June 8, the day before the US Weekly article appeared, Ed said this is on his website:
The Break-up
We were contacted last week by some tabloids, then a few messages tipping off some hot news coming in. This happens from time to time, though we have been doing a lot of press lately due to the new season, so it's expected.
Allegedly, Jill and I broke up and I have been seen "partying" and "around other girls." This is completely absurd. I mean, how in the world is this possible that I am seen out late...and I'm in the presence of women? The nerve of these people...just can't believe it!
Wait. Well maybe I can believe it. Last I checked I do not live in a monastery, and I'm definitely a bit of a frat boy at heart. Let's face it, I have fourteen of my college buddies living within two square miles of me. And I went to Michigan State, so these guys don't mess around. Not to mention Chicago is one of the world's largest adult playgrounds (and the most bars per capita in the US -very proud of this one). Don't get me wrong, I'm not out dating strippers and wearing Ed Hardy shirts either.
That said, Jill and I have had a few bumps here and there. Believe it or not, we actually have disagreed a few times too (I know, shocking!). And we are working through these things together. It's definitely not always easy, but we always stay positive.
There will always be rumors I'm sure. And there isn't a whole lot we can do about that. So keep 'em coming so I can restart my 15 minute clock over to the right! :)
******
And here's what Jillian tweeted the day before the article came out:
Good Morning Tabloids! Save your airmiles & your time, your working on a dry story ... @eswiderski & I are still going strong!
5:06 AM Jun 9th via web
And the day the article came out:
Had to laugh...Just read US weekly. It's not so much that I am a hermit... I'm just over so the bar scene. Especially city bars. Bleh
12:39 PM Jun 9th via Twitterrific
and
I do miss him, speculation does not drive actions, can't worry bout what others think, i'd go crazy! Lol thnk u 4 ur concern tho
However, she also tweeted cryptic messages such as these:
Exactly what the doctor ordered
1,276,463,577,000.00 via Twitterrific
and
Thank you, to all of you who have warmed my heart today... You know who you are.
1,276,555,571,000.00 via Twitterrific
and
thank you Gina... I needed to hear that today. Thanks for the reminder to keep it up. Xox
1,276,269,545,000.00 via Twitterrific
Also, she tweeted a link to her most recent interview, where she conspicuously refrains from mentioning Ed or her upcoming wedding at all (once the subject of oh so many tweets).
Check it out:
http://ow.ly/1YSL4
Finally, she appeared on Breakfast Television in Vancouver a day or so ago, waving her hand around, showing that she is not wearing her engagement ring.
What does all this mean? Is JED dead or alive?
Chris Harrison blogs Ali's Episode 4
Jun 15 2010 01:00 AM ET
Chris Harrison blogs ‘The Bachelorette’: Episode 4
by Chris Harrison
I’ve entitled this week’s episode “Guard and Protect Your Heart.” This was easily the best and yes, most dramatic episode so far. Before we dive in let’s answer some of your questions from last week. I love that somebody mentioned that none of the guys have hair on their chest. This person went on to ask if this is natural. Obviously, the answer is no. Most of the guys trim, shave, or wax their chest hair. I took a very informal poll (I asked one woman) and discovered that if a guy has a great body, then this is preferred. Now I pose this question to you: Is the hairless look preferred by most women, or do you stand by the old adage “Real men have chest hair”? Leave your comments below, and we’ll continue this debate next week.
Another commenter asked where the guys go after they are let go. The short answer is they go home. Obviously, they spend the night wherever we are, but they go home shortly after being eliminated. I know all the talk today around the water cooler (does anybody really ever talk around an actual water cooler?) is about Kasey and his actions this week. I need a minute to gather my thoughts and try to digest all of what I just saw, so let’s start with the other dates and then we’ll build up to Kasey.
The producers and staff know I love them, but I want to once again give major props to all those who create and put these dates together. This particular episode was visually awesome to watch. The Lion King group date on Broadway was unlike any date I’ve seen on this show. It’s incredible that the folks at The Lion King and Minskoff Theater allowed us on their stage for the date, but to actually permit us to be a part of their show is mind-blowing.
The first thing that stood out to me on this date was Jesse. Holy crap dude, you’ve got some vocal chops. Where have those been all season? Jesse’s singing blew everyone away, but it was Roberto who pulled out the smooth move and stole the show, literally. One of the guys brought up a great point about Roberto and Ali. They have shared some crazy moments together. Walking across a tightrope in downtown LA, performing in The Lion King. Those are the types of moments that relationships are built on, and the guys know this, and it’s killing them.
Ali got really sick the night of the Lion King date. She fought it off as long as she could, but the travel and schedule finally caught up with her. She was completely wiped out and lost her voice. She was such a trouper for rallying to celebrate Chris’ birthday with him. What did I tell you from day one about Chris L? I told you that you would fall in love with him. Well, if you haven’t fallen for this guy yet, you’re watching the wrong show. He’s such a solid man. He has good values and puts his family above all else; that’s a quality to be admired, and something I strongly believe in as well.
Okay, I’ve taken a deep breath: Let’s talk about Kasey. I’ve seen it all on this show. Every guy has his own style and his own way of sharing his feelings and love for a woman. Who am I to judge whether it’s right or wrong? So while I won’t say Kasey’s style is wrong, I have to ask, what is up with the singing? Once, okay, I’ll give you that. But four, five times? I loved the look on Ali’s face. She was speechless. It was so incredibly awkward for her. But at the end of that date she just chalked it up to a nervous, sweet guy who was trying too hard. So let me get this straight — a woman tells you to slow down and just relax, show her who you really are, and you go get a tattoo? What the *@#%? Hard to believe, I’m sure, but I am not a tattoo guy. Never had one and never will. With that said, I do know that if you are a tattoo guy, you probably shouldn’t get a permanent tattoo as a token of your love for a girl who’s dating not only you, but 10 other guys, too. Let’s take this a step further and talk about the placement of the tattoo. Again, I’m no expert, but on your wrist? At least Kasey didn’t get it on the small of his back. He explained the tattoo as a shield to protect Ali’s heart with eleven diamonds representing each guy still on the show. I’m pretty positive if Ali had seen this tattoo she wouldn’t have given him a rose. But Frank inadvertently saved Kasey by keeping him from exposing his new artwork to Ali. This ended up costing Jesse and Weatherman another week on the road to love. Eventually, Kasey will show Ali his new tat and we’ll see how she reacts.
Speaking of the road to love, as you heard Ali say, next stop is the land of fire and ice. Thanks to the active volcano, this trip was heavy on the fire. This week’s episode was really good, but fasten your seatbelts: The season is really about to take off.
Before signing off, I’d like to add a quick note about our new show Bachelor Pad. I’d like to officially welcome my friend Melissa Rycroft into the family as she will be helping me out as my co-host for the new show. We’ve just started production, and I can tell you already it’s going to be fantastic and unlike anything you’ve ever seen before. The show will air on ABC on Monday nights beginning August 9, following Ali’s season of The Bachelorette. Keep your comments coming and a quick shout out to the Uncle Julio girls. See, I always keep my word! As always you can find me on Twitter @chrisbharrison and Facebook.
ew.com
Chris Harrison blogs ‘The Bachelorette’: Episode 4
by Chris Harrison
I’ve entitled this week’s episode “Guard and Protect Your Heart.” This was easily the best and yes, most dramatic episode so far. Before we dive in let’s answer some of your questions from last week. I love that somebody mentioned that none of the guys have hair on their chest. This person went on to ask if this is natural. Obviously, the answer is no. Most of the guys trim, shave, or wax their chest hair. I took a very informal poll (I asked one woman) and discovered that if a guy has a great body, then this is preferred. Now I pose this question to you: Is the hairless look preferred by most women, or do you stand by the old adage “Real men have chest hair”? Leave your comments below, and we’ll continue this debate next week.
Another commenter asked where the guys go after they are let go. The short answer is they go home. Obviously, they spend the night wherever we are, but they go home shortly after being eliminated. I know all the talk today around the water cooler (does anybody really ever talk around an actual water cooler?) is about Kasey and his actions this week. I need a minute to gather my thoughts and try to digest all of what I just saw, so let’s start with the other dates and then we’ll build up to Kasey.
The producers and staff know I love them, but I want to once again give major props to all those who create and put these dates together. This particular episode was visually awesome to watch. The Lion King group date on Broadway was unlike any date I’ve seen on this show. It’s incredible that the folks at The Lion King and Minskoff Theater allowed us on their stage for the date, but to actually permit us to be a part of their show is mind-blowing.
The first thing that stood out to me on this date was Jesse. Holy crap dude, you’ve got some vocal chops. Where have those been all season? Jesse’s singing blew everyone away, but it was Roberto who pulled out the smooth move and stole the show, literally. One of the guys brought up a great point about Roberto and Ali. They have shared some crazy moments together. Walking across a tightrope in downtown LA, performing in The Lion King. Those are the types of moments that relationships are built on, and the guys know this, and it’s killing them.
Ali got really sick the night of the Lion King date. She fought it off as long as she could, but the travel and schedule finally caught up with her. She was completely wiped out and lost her voice. She was such a trouper for rallying to celebrate Chris’ birthday with him. What did I tell you from day one about Chris L? I told you that you would fall in love with him. Well, if you haven’t fallen for this guy yet, you’re watching the wrong show. He’s such a solid man. He has good values and puts his family above all else; that’s a quality to be admired, and something I strongly believe in as well.
Okay, I’ve taken a deep breath: Let’s talk about Kasey. I’ve seen it all on this show. Every guy has his own style and his own way of sharing his feelings and love for a woman. Who am I to judge whether it’s right or wrong? So while I won’t say Kasey’s style is wrong, I have to ask, what is up with the singing? Once, okay, I’ll give you that. But four, five times? I loved the look on Ali’s face. She was speechless. It was so incredibly awkward for her. But at the end of that date she just chalked it up to a nervous, sweet guy who was trying too hard. So let me get this straight — a woman tells you to slow down and just relax, show her who you really are, and you go get a tattoo? What the *@#%? Hard to believe, I’m sure, but I am not a tattoo guy. Never had one and never will. With that said, I do know that if you are a tattoo guy, you probably shouldn’t get a permanent tattoo as a token of your love for a girl who’s dating not only you, but 10 other guys, too. Let’s take this a step further and talk about the placement of the tattoo. Again, I’m no expert, but on your wrist? At least Kasey didn’t get it on the small of his back. He explained the tattoo as a shield to protect Ali’s heart with eleven diamonds representing each guy still on the show. I’m pretty positive if Ali had seen this tattoo she wouldn’t have given him a rose. But Frank inadvertently saved Kasey by keeping him from exposing his new artwork to Ali. This ended up costing Jesse and Weatherman another week on the road to love. Eventually, Kasey will show Ali his new tat and we’ll see how she reacts.
Speaking of the road to love, as you heard Ali say, next stop is the land of fire and ice. Thanks to the active volcano, this trip was heavy on the fire. This week’s episode was really good, but fasten your seatbelts: The season is really about to take off.
Before signing off, I’d like to add a quick note about our new show Bachelor Pad. I’d like to officially welcome my friend Melissa Rycroft into the family as she will be helping me out as my co-host for the new show. We’ve just started production, and I can tell you already it’s going to be fantastic and unlike anything you’ve ever seen before. The show will air on ABC on Monday nights beginning August 9, following Ali’s season of The Bachelorette. Keep your comments coming and a quick shout out to the Uncle Julio girls. See, I always keep my word! As always you can find me on Twitter @chrisbharrison and Facebook.
ew.com
Jillian diminishes The Bachelorette in favour of EMHE
From People magazine, June 14, 2010
Jillian Harris Says Extreme Makeover Gig Will Come Naturally
As an interior designer, Jillian Harris used her expertise to help rebuild a home on Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. Now, the former star of The Bachelorette says she’s going to bring something else to table when she joins the show’s team in its new season — heart.
“I grew up in a really small town, with a mom who always taught me to give back, that it was our responsibility to help others,” she told PEOPLE Friday at the CMA Music Festival in Nashville.
Her new job, she adds, is a far cry from another reality show she participated in. “Bachelor was just something that happened to me. It wasn’t anything I was looking for or wanting. It was a fluke, a lark. It was fun to do,” the Vancouver native says. “I got to travel around the world, work with great people who are still friends, and kiss five guys in one day! But it’s not really who I am.”
She did, of course, get to do The Bachelorette and meet her fiancé Ed Swiderski. Still, Harris insists, “Extreme Makeover is much more who I am.”
Jillian Harris Says Extreme Makeover Gig Will Come Naturally
As an interior designer, Jillian Harris used her expertise to help rebuild a home on Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. Now, the former star of The Bachelorette says she’s going to bring something else to table when she joins the show’s team in its new season — heart.
“I grew up in a really small town, with a mom who always taught me to give back, that it was our responsibility to help others,” she told PEOPLE Friday at the CMA Music Festival in Nashville.
Her new job, she adds, is a far cry from another reality show she participated in. “Bachelor was just something that happened to me. It wasn’t anything I was looking for or wanting. It was a fluke, a lark. It was fun to do,” the Vancouver native says. “I got to travel around the world, work with great people who are still friends, and kiss five guys in one day! But it’s not really who I am.”
She did, of course, get to do The Bachelorette and meet her fiancé Ed Swiderski. Still, Harris insists, “Extreme Makeover is much more who I am.”
Jesse Csincsak blogs Ali's Episode 4
I don't read any of the spoilers or reality forums about the show no chat rooms, no insiders nothing at all....
THESE ARE SIMPLY MY OPINIONS ABOUT THE SHOW..... NOT FACTS JUST MY OPINIONS FROM MY EXPERIENCES I HAD ON THE SHOW.....
IS IT JUST ME OR SHOULD SOMEBODY CALL AMERICAN IDOL Good lord all of these guys are aspiring singers....
With that being said here we go....
Once the guys leave the house it becomes pretty insane...There is even more people involved with the production watching what you do at all times and the time on lock down is even longer you don't have a Giant Compound to wonder around the yard you are locked up in a Massive hotel room with all the guys on the show... You can only watch so many movies and do so many pushups before you go insane... Even if you are traveling to a place that one of the guys use to live it doesn't matter they aren't gonna let you go anywhere near your house or your friends ITS LOCK DOWN TIME....
Robert from Bachelorette Season #4 Spent over 700 bucks just on movies and room service in one 3 day period... THAT SHOWS HOW BORING IT CAN GET...
The guys that are themselves 24/7 on camera and off are gonna start to do really well on the show at this point and the guys with something to prove or promote are gonna go home... Oh yeah when the guys go on dates and always have flowers and gifts for Ali Its all staged the producers hand that stuff to you when you leave to meet her for your date... WE ARE ON LOCK DOWN WE CAN'T GO TO THE STORE FOR FLOWERS AND SOUP ???? REALLY COME ON !!!!
Ali Said she is under the weather on tonights episode... Well thats because she is having 18 - 20 hour days not sleeping much, Traveling a ton and is under an immense amount of stress.. This Process will seriously take 7 years off your life in 2 months....
Notice that you almost never see Logos or brand names on the show they are always covered in Black tape... But when you do they promote the crap out of them...Tonights was the Andaz Hotel- Everytime they promote a Logo or Brand is because they are doing a trade Agreement with that Company.. So while they were in NYC they Stayed at the Andaz hotel for free of course cause that's how the trade works... When you can give a companies Logo Prime time TV coverage thats worth LOTS & LOTS OF MONEY !
There seems to be more and more Helicopter dates on this show but one thing you almost never see is that to do a Helicopter date there has to be two helicopters.... One is for the Bachelor/ette and his or her date and the other is to get all the cool arial camera shots for the show... Tonight we got to see a glimpse of the second heli as the first one was landing to pick up Ali and Kasey...
So for me when I watch the show I am always looking for RED FLAGS or Body Language that most people don't know how to not hide tonight I saw a red flag and it was from Ali... When the male hair dresser in the red Plaid shirt asked Ali if she felt like she was gonna end up with one of the guys that was here trying to win her heart SHE TOTALLY HESITATED and that was a red flag for me ....
OK Now onto the Guys:
KASEY: Singing ??? Ali said it ( CHEESEY ) !!! The Look on Alis face was priceless... She cant even hide that the producers are keeping this guy here at this point just for his drama factor... She wants him gone so bad she can taste it... My advice is if your not gonna sing to a girl everyday when you are dating her don't do it... Be yourself don't do anything you wouldn't normally do... Then he has the balls to say I SNUCK OUT TO GET A TATTOO ??? REALLY BRO - You really snuck out to get a tattoo camera crew, producers and all WOW... YOU ARE SNEAKY .... WOW I think he forgot 15 million people were gonna watch and Analyze or he wouldn't have said that ?? That was sooooo PRODUCED it wasn't even funny..
ROBERTO: This guy is very Genuine He's Just being himself... That gos along way especially with the guys.. You cant hate a guy for being a rad guy.. Hes kinda like the Kiptyn Locke of the season.. I loved when he said ( You cant describe what these experiences are like in words ) Hes totally right and thats why all of us cast members love to get together and compare stories Because we can all Relate...
FRANK: This Guy is Funny I love his Commentary making fun of the other guys its hilarious... He kinda reminds me of my Boy Jason Mesnick a little bit... Both Very Genuine Dudes...
KIRK: WELL DONE MAN ! First he let her know it was ok to go to bed early because she was sick then offers to walk her to her room... WELL PLAYED.. PS: Again if you are watching it on TV THEN THEY ARE NOT ALONE !!!! There were probably 2 -3 Camera crews in that room with them so probably around 8 -10 people there with them watching the whole thing unravel...
CHRIS L: This guy is also great dude... I love how family oriented he is ... You can see it when he talks about his mom or dad... Ali even dropped a little hint after talking to his dad on the phone she said I would love to marry into a family like that... I could see Ali ending up with him he is like an East Coast version of her life... San Fran is on the water just like Cape Cod... They have Alot in common I could see them ending up together...Nice work on the rose buddy...
JUSTIN: I LOVED when he said I am going on record to call him a fibber ! THERE ARE CAMERAS EVERYWHERE BRO.... Everything is on record did you forget your filming a TV SHOW ? Stop trying to get other guys in trouble and just DO YOU... Rated R got his man hahhahahahahahahah Right.....
JESSE: Loved how REAL he was when he got kicked off he said I can't wait to go home and see my dogs... Cool guy... Call me anytime bro we can grab a drink...
WEATHERMAN: Loved the shot of you watching Ali and Craig R on their 1 on 1 time hahhahaha Then you butted in and didn't even follow through with the steal ??? Dude Again Confidence is KEY... SUNNY SKIES Are in your future bro JUST DO YOU.... Cant wait to see you on Bachelor Pad bro Good luck...
NEXT WEEK ICELAND...
THESE ARE SIMPLY MY OPINIONS ABOUT THE SHOW..... NOT FACTS JUST MY OPINIONS FROM MY EXPERIENCES I HAD ON THE SHOW.....
IS IT JUST ME OR SHOULD SOMEBODY CALL AMERICAN IDOL Good lord all of these guys are aspiring singers....
With that being said here we go....
Once the guys leave the house it becomes pretty insane...There is even more people involved with the production watching what you do at all times and the time on lock down is even longer you don't have a Giant Compound to wonder around the yard you are locked up in a Massive hotel room with all the guys on the show... You can only watch so many movies and do so many pushups before you go insane... Even if you are traveling to a place that one of the guys use to live it doesn't matter they aren't gonna let you go anywhere near your house or your friends ITS LOCK DOWN TIME....
Robert from Bachelorette Season #4 Spent over 700 bucks just on movies and room service in one 3 day period... THAT SHOWS HOW BORING IT CAN GET...
The guys that are themselves 24/7 on camera and off are gonna start to do really well on the show at this point and the guys with something to prove or promote are gonna go home... Oh yeah when the guys go on dates and always have flowers and gifts for Ali Its all staged the producers hand that stuff to you when you leave to meet her for your date... WE ARE ON LOCK DOWN WE CAN'T GO TO THE STORE FOR FLOWERS AND SOUP ???? REALLY COME ON !!!!
Ali Said she is under the weather on tonights episode... Well thats because she is having 18 - 20 hour days not sleeping much, Traveling a ton and is under an immense amount of stress.. This Process will seriously take 7 years off your life in 2 months....
Notice that you almost never see Logos or brand names on the show they are always covered in Black tape... But when you do they promote the crap out of them...Tonights was the Andaz Hotel- Everytime they promote a Logo or Brand is because they are doing a trade Agreement with that Company.. So while they were in NYC they Stayed at the Andaz hotel for free of course cause that's how the trade works... When you can give a companies Logo Prime time TV coverage thats worth LOTS & LOTS OF MONEY !
There seems to be more and more Helicopter dates on this show but one thing you almost never see is that to do a Helicopter date there has to be two helicopters.... One is for the Bachelor/ette and his or her date and the other is to get all the cool arial camera shots for the show... Tonight we got to see a glimpse of the second heli as the first one was landing to pick up Ali and Kasey...
So for me when I watch the show I am always looking for RED FLAGS or Body Language that most people don't know how to not hide tonight I saw a red flag and it was from Ali... When the male hair dresser in the red Plaid shirt asked Ali if she felt like she was gonna end up with one of the guys that was here trying to win her heart SHE TOTALLY HESITATED and that was a red flag for me ....
OK Now onto the Guys:
KASEY: Singing ??? Ali said it ( CHEESEY ) !!! The Look on Alis face was priceless... She cant even hide that the producers are keeping this guy here at this point just for his drama factor... She wants him gone so bad she can taste it... My advice is if your not gonna sing to a girl everyday when you are dating her don't do it... Be yourself don't do anything you wouldn't normally do... Then he has the balls to say I SNUCK OUT TO GET A TATTOO ??? REALLY BRO - You really snuck out to get a tattoo camera crew, producers and all WOW... YOU ARE SNEAKY .... WOW I think he forgot 15 million people were gonna watch and Analyze or he wouldn't have said that ?? That was sooooo PRODUCED it wasn't even funny..
ROBERTO: This guy is very Genuine He's Just being himself... That gos along way especially with the guys.. You cant hate a guy for being a rad guy.. Hes kinda like the Kiptyn Locke of the season.. I loved when he said ( You cant describe what these experiences are like in words ) Hes totally right and thats why all of us cast members love to get together and compare stories Because we can all Relate...
FRANK: This Guy is Funny I love his Commentary making fun of the other guys its hilarious... He kinda reminds me of my Boy Jason Mesnick a little bit... Both Very Genuine Dudes...
KIRK: WELL DONE MAN ! First he let her know it was ok to go to bed early because she was sick then offers to walk her to her room... WELL PLAYED.. PS: Again if you are watching it on TV THEN THEY ARE NOT ALONE !!!! There were probably 2 -3 Camera crews in that room with them so probably around 8 -10 people there with them watching the whole thing unravel...
CHRIS L: This guy is also great dude... I love how family oriented he is ... You can see it when he talks about his mom or dad... Ali even dropped a little hint after talking to his dad on the phone she said I would love to marry into a family like that... I could see Ali ending up with him he is like an East Coast version of her life... San Fran is on the water just like Cape Cod... They have Alot in common I could see them ending up together...Nice work on the rose buddy...
JUSTIN: I LOVED when he said I am going on record to call him a fibber ! THERE ARE CAMERAS EVERYWHERE BRO.... Everything is on record did you forget your filming a TV SHOW ? Stop trying to get other guys in trouble and just DO YOU... Rated R got his man hahhahahahahahahah Right.....
JESSE: Loved how REAL he was when he got kicked off he said I can't wait to go home and see my dogs... Cool guy... Call me anytime bro we can grab a drink...
WEATHERMAN: Loved the shot of you watching Ali and Craig R on their 1 on 1 time hahhahaha Then you butted in and didn't even follow through with the steal ??? Dude Again Confidence is KEY... SUNNY SKIES Are in your future bro JUST DO YOU.... Cant wait to see you on Bachelor Pad bro Good luck...
NEXT WEEK ICELAND...
Monday, June 14, 2010
OKAY! THE BLOG IS OPEN FOR ANYONE TO POST NOW
Welcome everyone new and old. Feel free to post comments or your own original posts. This blog is now open to all. All you need is to make up a google email address, if you don't already have one. (whatever name you want @ gmail.com)
Hope to see you on here.
Marianna
Hope to see you on here.
Marianna
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Important message for all the Bach Board members who have come on here
Hi everyone,
I have just been made aware that if you were not among the original ones to sign up on this blog, you cannot post anything at the moment.
I have a message in to our friend (tall oak) Papa Jim to see if this can be changed.
How nice it would be to have our own blog here to discuss the show and all those other topics that come up -- away from the board mods capricious deleting habits!
So... hang in there; be patient and keep trying. I hope soon you all will be able to post here.
I will post my musings here each week from now on.
Marianna
I have just been made aware that if you were not among the original ones to sign up on this blog, you cannot post anything at the moment.
I have a message in to our friend (tall oak) Papa Jim to see if this can be changed.
How nice it would be to have our own blog here to discuss the show and all those other topics that come up -- away from the board mods capricious deleting habits!
So... hang in there; be patient and keep trying. I hope soon you all will be able to post here.
I will post my musings here each week from now on.
Marianna
Marianna's Musings: Final exam from Jake's season
Now that the season finale and ATFR have aired, it's time for you all to take your final exam. Pens and paper, everyone. Winner gets a free fondue pot and a year's supply of cheese.
1. At the St. Lucia outdoor market with Gia, why did Jake suddenly start bending his knees and swivelling ?
a) He wanted to celebrate his love for Gia
b) He was trying to relieve a wedgie
c) He was auditioning for Dancing With The Stars
2. Why did Jake's pants seem to get shorter and shorter this episode?
a) He got higher lifts leading up to the proposal scene
b) He was preparing for the inevitable flood of tears
c) He was working towards an eventual mankini
3. Why did Jake's parents, brothers and sisters-in-law all show up in St. Lucia?
a) They missed their daily family dog piles with Jake
b) Fleiss got a six-for-one coupon deal on a hotel room
c) They promised to provide free dental care to cast and crew
4. Why was Jake's dad crying so much?
a) His all-time favourite movie is "The Little Mermaid"
b) He'd found a copy of the script and saw the ending
c) He realized Fliess doesn't floss regularly
5. What's the best lesson Jake's family ever taught him?
a) No 'dog-piling' on a girl before marriage
b) Women are the glue; men just come unglued
c) Always wear drip-dry clothing when around pools
6. What's the best lesson Vienna's parents ever taught her?
a) Don't talk badly about others with your mouth full at the table
b) Trade pink cubic zirconia for Neil Lane diamonds every time
c) Your Bic razor can last a long time if you use it sparingly
7. Who also got a free trip to St. Lucia?
a) Jeffrey Osbourne
b) Rozlyn's producer's ex-wife
c) Tenley's ex-husband
8. What is the official food of the show?
a) Vienna sausage
b) Uncured ham
c) Cheese Whiz
9. Why did Jake's family change their initial impression of Vienna?
a) Fliess threatened to stick them with their hotel bill
b) Vinnie Girardi had some guys come by to 'talk' to them
c) They'd never seen such big teeth before
10. Why did the show take a trip to the mud baths?
a) Hot tubs and massage beds are so last season
b) Vienna wanted to try out Jake's future chest tattoo
c) Having practised it all season, the show wanted to sling mud for real
11. Which Disney creatures guided Tenley on her boating date with Jake?
a) Mermaids
b) Dolphins
c) Bluebirds
12. What was your favourite product placement on this episode?
a) Neil Lane diamonds
b) St. Lucia Tourism
c) Disney Corporation
13. What does Jake especially love about Tenley?
a) Her values and temperament
b) Her voice and dancing
c) That little hint of a mustache
14. What does Tenley especially love about Jake?
a) How good he always smells
b) How thoroughly he soaps his chest
c) How he never flubs his lines
15. What does Jake especially love about Vienna?
a) Her impeccable grammar
b) Her naturally long, blond hair
c) Her refreshing immaturity
16. On the ATFR episode, what did Jake call Vienna?
a) My bungee baby
b) My Hooter's honey
c) My Viennese vixen
17. What was the most suprising transformation of the ATFR show?
a) Ali quickly gets over her love for Jake in anticipation of 50 new guys
b) Vienna addresses the roots of her problems and gets a makeover
c) The audience, at first skeptical of the whole thing, warms up after a few cocktails
18. Where are Jake and Vienna going to call home for the next while?
a) Papa Vinnie's garage, so he can be close to his princess
b) As far away from Ali as humanly possible
c) Somewhere in L.A., close to DWTS studios
19. Who has formed the strongest pact?
a) Ali against Vienna, dragging the other bachelorettes along
b) Vienna against Ali, dragging Jake and the tabloids along
c) Fleiss against the thinking public, dragging Chris Harrison along
20. Arrange the following in the correct chronological order:
a) Ali leaves the show
b) Ali tries to come back to Jake
c) Ali get offered the role of new bachelorette
1. At the St. Lucia outdoor market with Gia, why did Jake suddenly start bending his knees and swivelling ?
a) He wanted to celebrate his love for Gia
b) He was trying to relieve a wedgie
c) He was auditioning for Dancing With The Stars
2. Why did Jake's pants seem to get shorter and shorter this episode?
a) He got higher lifts leading up to the proposal scene
b) He was preparing for the inevitable flood of tears
c) He was working towards an eventual mankini
3. Why did Jake's parents, brothers and sisters-in-law all show up in St. Lucia?
a) They missed their daily family dog piles with Jake
b) Fleiss got a six-for-one coupon deal on a hotel room
c) They promised to provide free dental care to cast and crew
4. Why was Jake's dad crying so much?
a) His all-time favourite movie is "The Little Mermaid"
b) He'd found a copy of the script and saw the ending
c) He realized Fliess doesn't floss regularly
5. What's the best lesson Jake's family ever taught him?
a) No 'dog-piling' on a girl before marriage
b) Women are the glue; men just come unglued
c) Always wear drip-dry clothing when around pools
6. What's the best lesson Vienna's parents ever taught her?
a) Don't talk badly about others with your mouth full at the table
b) Trade pink cubic zirconia for Neil Lane diamonds every time
c) Your Bic razor can last a long time if you use it sparingly
7. Who also got a free trip to St. Lucia?
a) Jeffrey Osbourne
b) Rozlyn's producer's ex-wife
c) Tenley's ex-husband
8. What is the official food of the show?
a) Vienna sausage
b) Uncured ham
c) Cheese Whiz
9. Why did Jake's family change their initial impression of Vienna?
a) Fliess threatened to stick them with their hotel bill
b) Vinnie Girardi had some guys come by to 'talk' to them
c) They'd never seen such big teeth before
10. Why did the show take a trip to the mud baths?
a) Hot tubs and massage beds are so last season
b) Vienna wanted to try out Jake's future chest tattoo
c) Having practised it all season, the show wanted to sling mud for real
11. Which Disney creatures guided Tenley on her boating date with Jake?
a) Mermaids
b) Dolphins
c) Bluebirds
12. What was your favourite product placement on this episode?
a) Neil Lane diamonds
b) St. Lucia Tourism
c) Disney Corporation
13. What does Jake especially love about Tenley?
a) Her values and temperament
b) Her voice and dancing
c) That little hint of a mustache
14. What does Tenley especially love about Jake?
a) How good he always smells
b) How thoroughly he soaps his chest
c) How he never flubs his lines
15. What does Jake especially love about Vienna?
a) Her impeccable grammar
b) Her naturally long, blond hair
c) Her refreshing immaturity
16. On the ATFR episode, what did Jake call Vienna?
a) My bungee baby
b) My Hooter's honey
c) My Viennese vixen
17. What was the most suprising transformation of the ATFR show?
a) Ali quickly gets over her love for Jake in anticipation of 50 new guys
b) Vienna addresses the roots of her problems and gets a makeover
c) The audience, at first skeptical of the whole thing, warms up after a few cocktails
18. Where are Jake and Vienna going to call home for the next while?
a) Papa Vinnie's garage, so he can be close to his princess
b) As far away from Ali as humanly possible
c) Somewhere in L.A., close to DWTS studios
19. Who has formed the strongest pact?
a) Ali against Vienna, dragging the other bachelorettes along
b) Vienna against Ali, dragging Jake and the tabloids along
c) Fleiss against the thinking public, dragging Chris Harrison along
20. Arrange the following in the correct chronological order:
a) Ali leaves the show
b) Ali tries to come back to Jake
c) Ali get offered the role of new bachelorette
Marianna's Musings: Ali's Premiere Episode
Ali's Well That Ends Well:
It's a kinder, gentler Ali we find as the show opens.
It seems she's washed that man Jake right out of her hair extensions. She's waxed philosophical about a job vs. true love and she's ready to prance about in cute outfits or fr0lic in the surf (sans leather boots this time) and meet her men.
Ain't love grand? Thanks to the miracle of reality television, one week, you can be collapsing in hotel hallways; the next, you are a pretty yellow flower (okay, she wore a black dress but be ready for more yellow) with men buzzing around you like bees.
Ali, as Queen Bee, was as charming and fun as a hostess could get. The cattiness and the pacts against Vienna were but a distant memory and Ali seemed nervous but effusive as she welcomed her men.
The Forecast? It's Raining Men (Hallelujah)
In honour of the weather man, let's try our hands at a sort of forecast. Who will be let go and who will go far in the competition?
(And the most important question of all: how many times will the phrase "for the right reasons" be uttered before all is said and done? -- the count is already at eight, after only one episode).
Frank: While his caption says "Retail Manager", Frank tells us he left a lucrative career in mergers and acquisitions and is now a living-in-the-parents'-basement type aspiring screenwriter. Uh oh. Is he here for... wait for it... the right reasons or does he just want his script read by some tv producers?
Or could he be this season's Mike Stag? He leaps, he bounds, he climbs tall limos. He declares his love for Ali even before meeting her. A bit... premature, isn't it? (Are we sure he's not the real ... er... 'shooter'?)
Craig M. aka 'the toupee man': Is that his own hair? Only his hairdresser knows for sure. Craig and his hair have attitude. From his first words to Ali, "wow, I'm so happy you're not Vienna", to his clashes with Kyle the wrestler, Craig managed singlehandedly to destroy the stereotype of the polite Canadian. He (and his hair) will be interesting to watch.
John C: Don't know how much romantic chemistry there is between Ali and him but he caught my attention with his clever spoof of "the proposal". Genuine fake cubic zirconia ring in hand, he got down on bended knee and took a few jabs at the silliness of this show. He got points for that in my book. Ali seemed to enjoy it too. He'll be 'the friend'.
Kyle the outdoorsman: Despite her declarations that she just LIVES to fish, Ali did a quick job of catch and release on this one.
Can we blame her? After giving us a taxidermic tour of all the cute critters he's slaughtered, Kyle offers us this compelling creed: It's lonely out there. No women, just trees. I need a woman." And just when we thought he couldn't get any weirder, he offers to eat the First Impression rose, so that it'll stay part of him forever.
Jonathan the weatherman: He's going to use his secret weapon: humour. Only problem, we didn't get to see much of it during the first episode. May be too early to judge but I sense some arrogance with a chance of a snowjob here.
Chris L: Now here's a genuine guy. A former high school math teacher, he left work to be with his dying mother. And he didn't even try to use the sympathy card by telling Ali about it on the first night.
But he is sensitive. How do I know? Why, because he obviously watches the show, recounting with alarming attention to detail, Ali's distressful "Jake or job" moment. All kidding aside, hope he goes far.
Justin 'Rated-R' the wrestler: A study in contrasts. Is he a ladies' man and so reviled by his peers that the overwhelming majority attempted to vote him off the island? Or is he the family-oriented sweetheart, kissing his grandma with promises to bring her home a nice wife (but not too pretty, 'cause the pretty ones are trouble, says grandma).
Ty the recently divorced one: Sure, he's charming; he's fun with a guitar and Ali likes his accent but is he this season's Tenley? On the rebound from his ex-wife? Let's see...
Jesse: Nice touch, to carve Ali a wooden heart. Not at all peculiar, even for a Peculiar man.
Roberto, of the 'hot sauce' dance: Ali is smitten and who can blame her. He so utterly charmed Ali that she couldn't even distinguish what his name was when he pronounced it the Latino way.
On the other hand, maybe it was just nerves. I'd be slightly unnerved too, if those soulful chocolate eyes were looking at me. It was such a magical moment that I almost forgot about the blatant stereotyping. Of course, not one of the white guys knows how to salsa dance, right? (Actually, having watched Jake dance with Gia in St. Lucia, maybe it's not such a stereotype after all...)
Kasey: Shades of "Fatal Attraction"? Mr. Intense, still reeling from the shock of his parents' divorce and of his father's infidelity (this happened when he was twelve), he tells Ali, within a few seconds of meeting her, ''I want you to know I will always be there to protect and guard your heart."
Later, we see him with his wrists bandaged while ambulances are in the background. Now all this may just be Fleissian fabrication but I'll bet he's been cast as the intense and slightly loopy one. Jake's Michelle. Jason's Tooth Nazi.
Oh, the marvels of editing. Thank goodness they all eagerly signed on the dotted line beside "we can (and will) besmirch your reputation at every turn."
Kirk: He's cute. And artsy. First he makes Ali a rose out of his red pocket puff. But wait, there's more. He also made her a scrapbook. And, from the looks of the teasers, he goes far.
I'm all for it. Scrapbooking in a man brings out his sensitive side, don't you think? Perhaps next he'll crochet her a doily. The possibilities are endless.
Derrick a.k.a. 'Shooter': Well, what can I say? He left, rather prematurely.
It's a kinder, gentler Ali we find as the show opens.
It seems she's washed that man Jake right out of her hair extensions. She's waxed philosophical about a job vs. true love and she's ready to prance about in cute outfits or fr0lic in the surf (sans leather boots this time) and meet her men.
Ain't love grand? Thanks to the miracle of reality television, one week, you can be collapsing in hotel hallways; the next, you are a pretty yellow flower (okay, she wore a black dress but be ready for more yellow) with men buzzing around you like bees.
Ali, as Queen Bee, was as charming and fun as a hostess could get. The cattiness and the pacts against Vienna were but a distant memory and Ali seemed nervous but effusive as she welcomed her men.
The Forecast? It's Raining Men (Hallelujah)
In honour of the weather man, let's try our hands at a sort of forecast. Who will be let go and who will go far in the competition?
(And the most important question of all: how many times will the phrase "for the right reasons" be uttered before all is said and done? -- the count is already at eight, after only one episode).
Frank: While his caption says "Retail Manager", Frank tells us he left a lucrative career in mergers and acquisitions and is now a living-in-the-parents'-basement type aspiring screenwriter. Uh oh. Is he here for... wait for it... the right reasons or does he just want his script read by some tv producers?
Or could he be this season's Mike Stag? He leaps, he bounds, he climbs tall limos. He declares his love for Ali even before meeting her. A bit... premature, isn't it? (Are we sure he's not the real ... er... 'shooter'?)
Craig M. aka 'the toupee man': Is that his own hair? Only his hairdresser knows for sure. Craig and his hair have attitude. From his first words to Ali, "wow, I'm so happy you're not Vienna", to his clashes with Kyle the wrestler, Craig managed singlehandedly to destroy the stereotype of the polite Canadian. He (and his hair) will be interesting to watch.
John C: Don't know how much romantic chemistry there is between Ali and him but he caught my attention with his clever spoof of "the proposal". Genuine fake cubic zirconia ring in hand, he got down on bended knee and took a few jabs at the silliness of this show. He got points for that in my book. Ali seemed to enjoy it too. He'll be 'the friend'.
Kyle the outdoorsman: Despite her declarations that she just LIVES to fish, Ali did a quick job of catch and release on this one.
Can we blame her? After giving us a taxidermic tour of all the cute critters he's slaughtered, Kyle offers us this compelling creed: It's lonely out there. No women, just trees. I need a woman." And just when we thought he couldn't get any weirder, he offers to eat the First Impression rose, so that it'll stay part of him forever.
Jonathan the weatherman: He's going to use his secret weapon: humour. Only problem, we didn't get to see much of it during the first episode. May be too early to judge but I sense some arrogance with a chance of a snowjob here.
Chris L: Now here's a genuine guy. A former high school math teacher, he left work to be with his dying mother. And he didn't even try to use the sympathy card by telling Ali about it on the first night.
But he is sensitive. How do I know? Why, because he obviously watches the show, recounting with alarming attention to detail, Ali's distressful "Jake or job" moment. All kidding aside, hope he goes far.
Justin 'Rated-R' the wrestler: A study in contrasts. Is he a ladies' man and so reviled by his peers that the overwhelming majority attempted to vote him off the island? Or is he the family-oriented sweetheart, kissing his grandma with promises to bring her home a nice wife (but not too pretty, 'cause the pretty ones are trouble, says grandma).
Ty the recently divorced one: Sure, he's charming; he's fun with a guitar and Ali likes his accent but is he this season's Tenley? On the rebound from his ex-wife? Let's see...
Jesse: Nice touch, to carve Ali a wooden heart. Not at all peculiar, even for a Peculiar man.
Roberto, of the 'hot sauce' dance: Ali is smitten and who can blame her. He so utterly charmed Ali that she couldn't even distinguish what his name was when he pronounced it the Latino way.
On the other hand, maybe it was just nerves. I'd be slightly unnerved too, if those soulful chocolate eyes were looking at me. It was such a magical moment that I almost forgot about the blatant stereotyping. Of course, not one of the white guys knows how to salsa dance, right? (Actually, having watched Jake dance with Gia in St. Lucia, maybe it's not such a stereotype after all...)
Kasey: Shades of "Fatal Attraction"? Mr. Intense, still reeling from the shock of his parents' divorce and of his father's infidelity (this happened when he was twelve), he tells Ali, within a few seconds of meeting her, ''I want you to know I will always be there to protect and guard your heart."
Later, we see him with his wrists bandaged while ambulances are in the background. Now all this may just be Fleissian fabrication but I'll bet he's been cast as the intense and slightly loopy one. Jake's Michelle. Jason's Tooth Nazi.
Oh, the marvels of editing. Thank goodness they all eagerly signed on the dotted line beside "we can (and will) besmirch your reputation at every turn."
Kirk: He's cute. And artsy. First he makes Ali a rose out of his red pocket puff. But wait, there's more. He also made her a scrapbook. And, from the looks of the teasers, he goes far.
I'm all for it. Scrapbooking in a man brings out his sensitive side, don't you think? Perhaps next he'll crochet her a doily. The possibilities are endless.
Derrick a.k.a. 'Shooter': Well, what can I say? He left, rather prematurely.
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